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I may look like I'm having Deep Thoughts...... but 99% of the time I'm thinking about what l'm going to eat later.

LOL Sounds so much like me!

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SORRY....Yesterday was the deadline for all complaints!!!

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You never realize how boring your life is...until someone asks what you like to do for fun.

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It seems the older I get the meaner I get.... soon I may start biting people.

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Only when the tide goes out do you discover who's been swimming naked.

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Would you like to come over and watch porn on my flat screen mirror?

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Yes, please! Have a great day, bud! ;)

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If you think you're too small to be effective, then you've never been in the dark with a mosquito.

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Sorry I missed your call, I took too long to answer because I was dancing to the ringtone.

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I'm not sure what my spirit animal is.. but I'm confident it has rabies.

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