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My boss hates it when I shorten his name to Dick........ Especially since his name is Steve.

Are you working for Steve Head by any chance????

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At my age, "getting lucky" means finding my car in the parking lot.

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I love being me... It pisses off all the right people.

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Absoulte truth, so suck it up bastards! Thanks for sharing!

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Silence is golden...... Unless you have kids...... then silence is just suspicious.

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The fact that there is a Highway to Hell and only a Stairway to Heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic patterns.

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hahahaha...i love this one haha...

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Apparently, it's only appropriate to say, "look at you! you got so big!"... to children

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A quiet man... is a thinking man..... A quiet woman ...is usually mad!!

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I'm on that new gin and tonic diet.... so far I've lost three days.

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