Being the "center of attention" at the nude beach or resort.
This is a subset to my other thread on "dabbling" with nudism; I thought it merited its own thread.
Whereas there are people who practice nudism in a semi-private way: sun tanning, swimming and socializing nude alone or within a small group of friends or S/O's, there are people who take on a much more active approach.
At the nude beach I've seen nudists walk around, talk to other nudists they didn't know, introduce themselves to newbies; sitting next to them or standing over them while talking.
At the resort I've seen people do the same. Some were very active in resort activities: even my ex, on occasion, would jump up and volunteer to participate in or manage activities. Taking "center stage" and directing activities. I once chatted with a young lady who had been a "children activities coordinator" at a French resort. Her job was to direct activities for kids; and her position required nudity. She admittedly loved her job.
So I was just wondering; being an introvert myself: where does this "extra nudist comfort" come from? Some nudists "shy away" from being "front and center" within nudists groups; or from being "in your face naked." Others embrace it. I can think particularly of nude models who actually pose completely nude in front of other people.
How or why do they do it?
This is a subset to my other thread on "dabbling" with nudism; I thought it merited its own thread.Whereas there are people who practice nudism in a semi-private way: sun tanning, swimming and socializing nude alone or within a small group of friends or S/O's, there are people who take on a much more active approach.At the nude beach I've seen nudists walk around, talk to other nudists they didn't know, introduce themselves to newbies; sitting next to them or standing over them while talking.At the resort I've seen people do the same. Some were very active in resort activities: even my ex, on occasion, would jump up and volunteer to participate in or manage activities. Taking "center stage" and directing activities. I once chatted with a young lady who had been a "children activities coordinator" at a French resort. Her job was to direct activities for kids; and her position required nudity. She admittedly loved her job.So I was just wondering; being an introvert myself: where does this "extra nudist comfort" come from? Some nudists "shy away" from being "front and center" within nudists groups; or from being "in your face naked." Others embrace it. I can think particularly of nude models who actually pose completely nude in front of other people.How or why do they do it?
I think it's inherent, just like nudism ... you're born with that trait and personality. I'm the extrovert and my wife is an introvert. She can be very shy and she's a very private person. Just because she's a nudist and willingly participates in social nudism, she's not about to tell you everything about her and in fact, she may be quiet aloof in general until she gets to know you. I, on the other hand, am pretty much an open book and I have been all my life. Opposites must attract because we found each other and have been together for over 47 years.
My extrovert nature is sometimes stifled in the social nudist setting because I don't want to leave Di out or leave her alone on the lounge or in the corner at a function. Once she's comfortable with those around her, she'll come out of her shell or if she's comfortable in the setting or the club or resort. She's still pretty guarded at the beach and I'm very protective and she's never outta my sight there.
It would be my nature and preference to meet people, introduce myself and us to others but out of respect for Di, I keep that in check. I've gone up to couples and single women on the nude beaches for various reasons and I've always been accepted as respectful of their boundaries or need to be left alone. Most of the single women I've approached have been bothered by other men and they all seemed to have been genuinely appreciative. Some couples have appreciated the friendliness and others will say, "we just want to be left alone, " and I respect that. Sometimes being the extrovert and friendly isn't always well received.
Though an extrovert, I'm not one to look for the limelight or center of attention. It's happened many times before in textile situations and it can be rather embarrassing because no one ever really does EVERYTHING themselves and most times when you're singled out for doing something that casts that center of attention light, there's usually someone that was right there beside you or behind you to help you there. When Di is complimented on her comfortable nature in social nudism situations, she's very quick to respond that she would never have done this without me and my encouragement, support and love.
Ironic that so often opposites attract. I was born an extrovert and problem solver. I'm very comfortable taking over and running construction job site or speaking in front of large groups. My wife is a shy introvert. Wants no mention of her name even though she is a doer and very involved in a lot of things. It's just the way we are. I was visiting a club by myself once years ago. I was hardly acknowledged, welcomed by any member and only couple of them said hello when I walked by their places.
I saw that as a problem and so at our home club I make sure to make a guest feel welcomed. Even offer them our spare golf cart. I will not approach a female to welcome her unless she has a male companion or my wife is with me. Nudony I know exactly what you speak as I have seen more than once a guy looming over Mrs Rock making small talking when she is laying out at a pool ect. Yup that's what she wants, some guys schwong looking her straight in the face.
I get that they may be extroverted types but come on. Single guys in my experience are the worst offenders. I think they may have the mindset if they don't put themselves out front and center they will not garner any attention. My thinking anyway.
Single guys in my experience are the worst offenders. I think they may have the mindset if they don't put themselves out front and centre they will not garner any attention. My thinking anyway.
The thing is clothed or nude a lot of men think they are the best thing to the female sex and think back to the old adverts for the chest expanderas and the beach where the chap has used them get the girls and the other men just run away.
I think that some people who are more "front and center of attention" do so because of the "ego boost" or "euphoria" nudity in certain situations or certain settings provides for them.
But I'll have to agree with Andy and RD that personality type has most to do with nudist behavior, most of the time.
I'm an introvert. So I guess it's no surprise that the women in my life have been extroverts! I've talked about how my ex, once she got though her reluctant stage, became very socially active and very visible in our nudist social circles. This was no different from how she was in the textile world; only then she also did it with no clothes on. My current fiancee, after spending our first day at Club O and her first time ever socially nude, ended up having conversations with every single nudist sitting by us.
Myself, unless I'm involved in physical activity like swimming or running - where I may "temporarily" appear like an extrovert because of the nudist "euphoria" I'm feeling - I'm a quiet dude. Being the "center of attention" is something I otherwise shy away from. So I do admire those people who are just "out there", being social and meeting "10 new nudists" in the course of an afternoon, being involved, who have no issues being "front and center of attention." I have loved bringing the women in my life and just seeing them bring that extrovertedness to nudism. And it has helped me as well be less "reclusive."
I think extroverts are essential to nudism because of the confidence their outgoingness can instill in others. It's communicable. I've seen shy newbies/reluctant spouses interact with extroverts and gain from them the motivation to be socially nude. They are otherwise often just a pleasure to be around; more so than the introvert sitting on the other side of the pool not saying or doing much of anything.
That being said, is there a point where nudist extrovertedness can "cross a line"? I think some extroverts can be oblivious to other nudists' comfort levels. I've mentioned guys randomly starting conversations with people in very "in your face" ways. But it's not just men who do this; both my ex and fiance have also done it. Although people's reaction to it may have been different because they were women, there is still an element of "surprise" when someone looks up at a person talking to them and it's a labia that appears directly in their line of vision. Although the situation might be inconsequential in the textile world...well it's a bit different in the nudist world.
But I still think that extroverts are so essential to nudism that the occasional "thoughtlessness" is a relatively small price to pay - unless it is brazenly offensive. We need them there. How boring would nudism be if it was just people sitting around the pool quietly minding their own business?
That being said, is there a point where nudist extrovertedness can "cross a line"? I think some extroverts can be oblivious to other nudists' comfort levels. I've mentioned guys randomly starting conversations with people in very "in your face" ways. But it's not just men who do this; both my ex and fiance have also done it. Although people's reaction to it may have been different because they were women, there is still an element of "surprise" when someone looks up at a person talking to them and it's a labia that appears directly in their line of vision. Although the situation might be inconsequential in the textile world...well it's a bit different in the nudist world.But I still think that extroverts are so essential to nudism that the occasional "thoughtlessness" is a relatively small price to pay - unless it is brazenly offensive. We need them there. How boring would nudism be if it was just people sitting around the pool quietly minding their own business?
Sure, extrovert nudists can and do "cross the line."
My wife, the introvert and very private person, had an issue with a close male nudist friend and it was making her very nervous and not wanting to visit with him but was still quite close to his wife. Not wanting to make a scene or disturb the balance of the friendship, in her mind, she allowed something to take place until we talked about it and we came up with a solution.
This friend thought it was okay to give me wife a peck on the lips when we greeted them and when we said goodbye. After the third time, she began to resist getting together. She felt that if she just hugged and not allowed him to give her the peck, she would somehow upset or annoy him. She began making the first move and hugging hello and goodbye and not giving him the chance to give her the peck. He seemed taken back by this because he'd done it a few times and it seemed fine.
He then asked me, "is everything okay with us? Di seems a little peeved at me." I said, "no, all's fine, just don't try and kiss her on the lips again. She doesn't like it and I'd prefer you didn't. A kiss on the cheek is fine." He was very understanding but thought ... "I just figured it was okay being as we've known each other for so long and have been naked together for so long." I had to explain that just because we'd known each other for over 14 years, been naked together for all those years each time we've gotten together, that there were still boundaries to consider and part of nudism is learning friends and other's boundaries and comfort levels with many things and not only when we are naked.
Some extroverts can go the extra mile when we are naked. I like having fun but some extroverts, men and women included, can go full gear into "party mode." Tact, manners, respect ... can take a back seat because "hey, we're naked and that means we wanna have fun!" Di and I vacationed at Club O one year. We went a week off from all of our friends. We only had a few days overlap and they all left for home. Di and I met this really nice couple from RI. During a gathering down the beach at another restaurant/bar, a group of us had pulled out money and hired a DJ and the bar/restaurant stayed open until 12:30 am for about 40 of us. We were dancing and by then the sarongs were left at the table and the female of the couple we befriended began to dance a bit suggestive and literally began humping my leg. I politely grabbed her shoulders, moved her back and then gave her a hug and said ... "ahhh, no thanks!" My wife stated that this woman's husband never made a move like that but after thinking about it, he was the introvert. I often wondered if this guy asked his wife what the hell she thought she was doing!
We've witnessed a hug turn into a slide of hand down the back and down the butt, with the female (usually the one having their butt felt) turning abruptly and giving some guy the evil eye. Some of this could be attributed to a possible invitation to something else (partying/swinging/light swinging) but it's the extrovert nudist that usually makes this first move and it can make an introvert very uncomfortable and the extrovert, like myself, guarded and always on the lookout.
Although I haven't been to any resort or beach yet. I was exceedingly shy from as early as I remember, and it's still with me just a little. My sister would walk up to strangers and start a conversation, I was scared of strangers at 2 years old and wanted to hide. Being center of attention makes me uncomfortable, and that's before naked even comes into the picture. Being in a crowd makes me uncomfortable slightly, even a small one. It's just the way the genes fell I guess, coupled with life's experience of course can modify the original nature somewhat. Working alone out in the woods and gardens is what I like. I think I'd enjoy a certain amount of social life nude, as long as it's the right kind. Gardening with other nude loving souls would be best. I like to call it Adam and Eve style gardening. Although there aint no Eve yet. Sometimes I wish there was, but it can wait awhile yet. ----------ReubenT
A subject similar to this was discussed several years ago. As I remember a lot of people who were normally very shy became very out going and personable when they were nude. This was very surprising to them and unbelievable to their companions. The one reason that I remember this is, the same thing happened to me. I was always very shy and reserved, but after becoming a social nudist, I became very out going. I would introduce myself and talk to strangers which is something I would have never done as a textile. Through the years I have heard many other people discuss similar behavior. Seems like it is quite common.
A subject similar to this was discussed several years ago. As I remember a lot of people who were normally very shy became very out going and personable when they were nude. This was very surprising to them and unbelievable to their companions. The one reason that I remember this is, the same thing happened to me. I was always very shy and reserved, but after becoming a social nudist, I became very out going. I would introduce myself and talk to strangers which is something I would have never done as a textile. Through the years I have heard many other people discuss similar behavior. Seems like it is quite common.
I might have responded in that older thread. I have gained more confidence since becoming a nudist, and it has spilled over to speaking to large groups at work, too.
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