To compliment or not, gay vs straight.
Good afternoon men,
Just a general question of interest, at least to me, that I would like throw out there and see what comments come back.
I have spent a better part of 30 years working in theatrical costuming industry and general sewing. A large part of my work is spent on observing the body in all it's form and directly moving the body as I do fittings and such. As a result I have been a keen observer of all body shapes and sizes, indiscriminately of it's gender.
Since I have found this site, I have spent my spare time looking at photos and observing the differences from people to people. I pass no judgement but I look at them with, very often, the question of how would I fit this person or body. What would I do with such a long torso and short legs, or what would I do to adjust the length of the sleeve for what appears to be very long arms and such.
I also observe that people have bodies that would fit better in certain historical context rather than others.
Ok, Ok, Ok, now I know that this was a long preamble, but here is my question.
Being an observe as mentioned, I sometime like to sent a compliment to people when I find their physiques interesting. I make no mention of anything sexual, but just a general, you are well put together and aren't you lucky, kind of sentiment to both men and woman.
But here is the but, I'm never very sure on how straight men would react to this. Being gay I'm always a little hesitant to send a compliment since it has been my experience in the past ( no reflection on the men of this site so far, since I've really only been active in the last month or so, despite being on the site for a few years), that some men think that I just want to get to have sex with them. Now, that may have to do with being on some other site not necessarily devoted uniquely to nudism. I have complimented a few men in the past since observing that many men of a certain age are certainly a far cry from being decrepit as the youth movement would have us believe and do inspire still that one can better their physical condition despite their advanced years. Thoughts ? Comments ? Perspectives ?
Best regards.
How odd, two entries about clothing on a nudist website! I never was any good at choosing clothes which makes my nudism the more delightful. A theatrical dresser will quite rightly notice the peculiarities in the people he is fitting. But is one any better than another? Another delight in nudism is that we come in all shapes and sizes - wonderful variety. I think what matters most is body confidence, being comfortable in our own skin. That throws out a body language which far outweighs any fitness, fatness or folds that might be in that person's body.
I couldnt agree more, I mean, feeling good in our skins shouldnt have anything to do with the way we look, but mostly about the way we feel and connect with the world around us and the people who live in it. Thankfully enough, as awkward as this may sound, I realized during the last couple of years, that older men actually liked to be complimented about their appearance, both by straight and gay men alike and I also feel that if new generations had a similar approach, life in this troubled world of ours, could, somehow, become slightly easier.
Allow me to add a caveat here.
I may have, with my preamble, confused the issue here for discussion. I only mention the clothing examples since, as work, this is what I have be trained to do, but that is only after I have observed the naked body of both men and women.
I sometimes would like to compliment an other man for his physique, his tone, his body proportions etch..., but my hesitation is very much guided by my fear, the latter is for a lack of a better word, to be offensive to an other male of the species. It has been my experience in the past that many men would interpret such a compliment as a sexual advance as opposed to a simple compliment that it's often meant to be.
Mind you, many times, even between gay men, a mere compliment is often seen as a sexual advance. Pity I say. One may be very handsome and alluring with certain endowment that would appear to be desirable, but if you're going to be an arrogant twit, one is not that pretty. Just saying.
I hope this puts back the discussion on the right track.
Cheers.
Certainly men your age and older are likely to be more pleased than upset, straight or gay. Every single person on this site who has posted a photo has meant it to be seen by other members; if your comments are specific to the photo, and non-sexual, it's hard to see how anyone would be offended.
Interesting topic. It is very well addressed on a great nudist book I've just finished reading, "Naked at Lunch". Author Mark Haskell Smith interviews a colleage of yours and she expresses quite the same sentiment and feelings you kindly share with us. Even though she is not a nudist, she admires human bodies and forms, no matter whether clothed or not.
Answering to your question, I appreciate compliments on TN unless in any way offensive - sexual, malicious, ironic or with double entendre.
I sometimes avoid commenting on photos for the same reason as the OP. I think that some photos are designed just to feature the celebration of being naked (closeup of a couple, eg), some are in interesting situations or scenery (naked on a mountaintop), a portrait that most of us will never get to hang above the mantle, or sometimes just acknowledging "here I am, a naked person"). So when I do comment I am inclined to find something relevant to comment on rather than just the condition of a body. Based on that I will do more commenting because people have put themselves out there in a unique way and we should let each other know that we are enjoying them enjoying their nude selves. Cheers, thx for the interesting comments. You are right, we all love pisitive .acknowledgement
As I see it we're all nudists, used to being in clothes-free situations where we see and are seen by others--all of us fully naked. Horticulturists enjoy compliments on their plants, artists enjoy showing their paintings and welcome compliments as well. By posting nude photos here we're
likewise displaying something we're passionate about, so why attach unnecessary interpretations to another's compliment? It seems like to do so is living on the verge of paranoia about the fact that we're being seen naked. I think we all like to feel good about ourselves and nudism is a great way to promote self-esteem. Even a comment on my backside or bush is something I regard as being positive, so why go into a homophobic tailspin when uncalled for?
If you like to compliment, just go ahead. ;)People who are not open to that, shouldn't have pictures of themselves on here.
I'm straight.
I post pictures on this site.
I welcome comments.
If I didn't want people to see my naked body I wouldn't post pictures.
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