What is your funniest sleeping nude story?
I have always slept naked since I was very young. Once, when I was about 13 I spent the summer on my grandparents farm. This one time the covers fell off of me in my sleep. The next morning like in the photo this was how my grandma found me. I was face down, ass up and uncovered. All she said to me was that it was time for breakfast. As I woke up I noticed I was naked, uncovered, and that my grandma had just seen my ass. I was a little embarrassed and nervous. I was not sure what she would say or how angry she would be. I got dressed and went down to breakfast. She acted like nothing happened, and nothing was ever said.
I've often been caught naked in the middle of the night, usually on my way to the bath room or when a visitor sets off the house alarm.
The best time was when we heard water running downstairs. The hose had come off the washing machine and the down stairs was inches deep in water. So (after turning the water off) my wife and I opened the front door and literally bailed out hurling pans full of water out of the door. It took several hours. We finally got it down to a mop able level and could pause. Only then did we realise that we were both completely naked.
I was in a low-end motel in Santa Monica and stirred awake to realize that someone was in my room. I'd missed a bit of cash from my billfold the day before, and realized that this was probably the thief, back again for a second night. Lay there and thought about it for a while, pretending to be asleep until I was thoroughly awake and ready to act - then sprang naked out of bed, spread my arms and legs to make myself look as big and dangerous as possible - I towered over the guy - and ordered him out. He gave me a kind of deer-in-headlights stare, and then quickly disappeared.
Some years ago I was living in a small town in an older neighborhood where the houses were pretty close together. Late one night we were in bed we woke to hear this kind of wing flutter. Turning on the light it turned out there was a bat doing 360's around the bed room. Of course being the man of the house, I was supposed to do something and, having lived in old houses and having had dealings with bats before, I had learned that the easiest way to catch a bat was to catch it from behind with a butterfly net. I had a towel on my head (because of the old wives tale of bats getting tangled in your hair and giving you rabies or some such) and was chasing this thing around the upstairs turning lights on as I went. It flew down the stairs into the living room, then the dining room and back to the living room and I, not to be caught off guard, was turning lights on as I went back and forth. Being summer, the windows were open and no curtains pulled. I eventually caught the little fellow and released it outside. The next morning I saw my neighbor who was leaving for work the same time I was. He said something about noticing my house all lit up in the middle of the night. I explained about the bat and he said "Ok I get it now. Both my wife and I were wondering about the butterfly net and the towel on your head". From then on whenever I saw him he would call me Batman and chuckle.
This happened one night when my dad was working out of town , I had been sleeping well when I heard my mom yelling to get up something was wrong with our furnance I got up it was very hot I ran into the hallway my mother and sister were standing my mom said to go and shut down furnace so I ran down staires and saw the stat it was over 90 I went into the basement and shut it down I came back up staires and they were in the kitchen I said I was going to open some windows to get the heat out . I did that went back into the kitchen my mom said I might want to put something on I really never relized vi was naked the hole time
In 1964 I was a college freshman living in a private dorm at the University of Texas. The dorm had heat but no air conditioning. As the end of the year approached those rooms got pretty warm and stuffy. I already slept nude but at that point also kicked the covers off a lot. One morning I had slept in but started to awaken when I heard an odd noise. I was sleeping on my side with no covers and was completely exposed. I opened one sleepy eye only to see the cleaning lady sweeping the floor between my bed and my roomate's bed. The covers were out of reach and I couldn't think of any graceful way out of this. I just shut my eyes again and pretended to sleep until I heard the door close as she left.
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