Gay/Straight Bromance
I guess I'm kind of an abnormal case. Being gay/bisexual, I have no gay friends. All of my friends are straight, and most of them are men. I have actually opened the minds of quite a few straight men and cleared a lot of stereotypes. I do have a couple of straight guys that are really truly close friends though. I have never thought of them sexually and I think they know that. The problem is exactly that the stereotype. These friends get made fun of and joke on because their best friend is a gay man. I just want to know what is wrong with the straight guy having a gay friend.
Speaking from my ironic and rebellious heart, I'd like to respond that there is a huge problem of gay and straight men fraternizing with one another! Men who consider themselves "male and sexual and that is enough" may relinquish their need to verify their inherent value as a beautiful and unique person with others seeking in exerting their power to be equal over them.
The terms "gay" and "straight" or (your favorite prefix here)sexual were all created to divide and separate people into categories in order to control them. If such artificial concepts are not honored, people might just start running around free of guilt and shame, thereby threatening the stability of society.
Be anxious and (insert their favorite prefix here)phobic, ignore that you and other men have balls and all shall be well. Perhaps not on your terms, but your duty is sacrifice after all. Man up and do what they say!
To drwolfe. Of course there's nothing wrong with straight guys having gay guy friends. But the facts are ...gay is still frowned upon by much of society. This has lightened in the last number of years which is certainly a good thing, but many of our str8 (guys especially) are still a little nervous to admit that they have gay friends for fear of being teased etc. And of course some may say well some of those str8 guys have a little gay curious interest themselves and don't want to out themselves - and for certainly not all str8 guys but for a number , I suspect this is true. Doesn't make them "gay" but gay curious ..that may lead to more self discovery that they're just not ready for yet.
What difference does the sexual orientation of your friends make? Friends are friends and compartmentalizing them by sex or sexual orientation seems wrong to me. I used to attend an "all inclusive" church that catered to LGBTQ and hating those that didn't wear one of these labels. I didn't last long there. I personally think that we should remove all labels and just enjoy each other as friends because of our common interests and preferences and not wonder what people will think because my friend is gay or Catholic or female or whatever. They are your friends, you get to choose. Each friend is unique and the relationship with each is unique. Enjoy each day like it is your last and love each friend like they are the only one!
Gay, bi or straight, few men have a large number of truly close friends. It is one of the sad aspects of our American culture. When a straight and gay man become close friends - a bromance - it inevitably leads to some joking and sometimes to pointedly unkind reactions. As with any relation or marriage, what works is what is important regardless of the outside flak. Life is too short to live it for other people, except in an altruistic manner.
I understand a lot of what you say. Although I am straight much of my social nudity has been with gays. And 'I' have learned a lot!
Firstly, at the beach places I frequent, the 'gay' areas are usualy more populated. You can't exactly practice 'social' nudity IF there is no one to be social with! Secondly, gay people know how to have fun! Perhaps they don't have keep up the hyper-macho image & feel more free to be themselves without pretension. Thirdly, gay people tend to be more friendly & less afraid of demonstrating affection. I remember one of my first visits, I didn't make an issue about a label or gender preference & neither did they. We were just a bunch of guys laughing, having fun, & enjoying a naked day together. That evening as I was leaving the group I felt a swat on my ass! Shock quickly turned to satisfaction when I realized they had accepted me. That became a badge of honor for me.
Too often we allow labels to get in the way of really knowing a person. I like for people to get to know me for 'me'. Not prejudiced by a label or some other preconceived idea.
I believe we should drop our labels when we drop our shorts & get to know each other for who we really are.
Nudity does NOT automatically equal sexuality. That equation can be said of straight & gay.
Let's not limit our social relationships to gender preference. We ARE more than our genitalia.
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