Trophies
I sometimes think that there are those who befriend others just to add to their list of friends as "trophies", not as true friends.
I thought the purpose of having friends was to mutually correspond with news and events, as one would similar to a friend on the phone.
It seems obvious that there are those who have so many friends (hundreds or thousands) that they may find it difficult to correspond with them all.
Probably some have not heard from them in years. I regularly clear out any who don't or haven't corresponded as one would expect.
Yep, just like Facebook and other sites there are people that just friend ever so they can brag about how many friends they have. I even say in my profile, if I havent exchanged messages with you etc I wont friend you but people send friend requests anyway without even a simple note.
I find it interesting that I have only ten friends on this site, and two of them are on this thread. But then, most of my friends are local to me geographically (or have been), which explains why I've befriended them. (And, yes, "befriend" is a word. It predates "friend" as a verb, but you don't see in around much anymore.)
I never understood the need for trophies or massive collections of "friends" on sites. After 7 years here, I've amassed a collection of 2. I have received several requests over the years, but considering that 99% were from spammers it didn't leave much to choose from. Even my Facebook account after more than a dozen years has only accumulated about 20 friends.
I personally don't send requests. Since I'm a single male, regardless of my profile showing that I am in a relationship, I feel that my requests would be viewed as suspicious by most. Therefore I won't waste my time, or anyone else's.
I never practiced sending friend request. I have only a few times in the 9 yrs now. Example I read Andydi's content for a few years before I felt a good groove and most know I co-mod now some of his groups . I don't reach out and friend request females for certain.
Heck we have close nudist couple friends for years and if I want to communicate with the wife I have Luann call them. I know that I could call or text them without an issue I'm just not comfortable in doing so. Perhaps I'm a little quirky, friends that we we have been naked with for many years I don't care to talk to the female unless Luann has me on speaker or hands me the phone.
To me a few good, real friends who are there for you when you need somebody (and vice versa), who you can have both joyful and serious conversations with, is worth infinite more then having I don't know how many "friends" you almost always never hear anything from and make you feel you are just a number on their list.
To me a few good, real friends who are there for you when you need somebody (and vice versa), who you can have both joyful and serious conversations with, is worth infinite more then having I don't know how many "friends" you almost always never hear anything from and make you feel you are just a number on their list.
Well said as a few good ones are far better than many who aren't there when you need them even if for a chat on the phone.
I go through my list of friends periodically. If I find that any have not logged in quite a while, I'll delete them. If some of the friends have ventured in a different direction than when we became friends and we don't have much in common anymore, I'll delete them. Those on my friends list do continue to communicate with us either by messages or in groups or forum discussions.
Like Rockdad mentioned, we both follow posts on topics from perspective friends. Making a friend here does not happen over night. I've had many, many requests to be friends by some and I tell them, "lets communicate a bit before we decide to be friends." Then... crickets! They don't want to communicate, all they want is access to our pictures. On rare occasion, I'll get someone that responds with typical questions about our nudist life and then it turns to my wife and kids and when I tell them to keep it between us for now, they disappear from communication. Lots of red flags go up with these people. Some of them, I block.
When I look at someone's profile to decide if I want them as part of my groups, I look at their profile, how much they contribute to discussions, groups they belong to and ... friends. Many, many times, I've not allowed guys or couples to join because they have over a thousand friends and when I check their friends list, lots and lots of profiles of young women with profile pics from the internet.
I learned early on that this site is not like Facebook. I sent probably 100 friend request that first day. As a newbie, I was looking for guidance and was hoping that those I reached out to would be kind and helpful. I soon learned that most of the people I reached out to had not logged on in years and the others were mostly not interested in befriending a single male. The ones that did accept my request are for the most part friend collectors.
No I know that you dont have to be a friend with someone to have a conversation. Forums and DM works just fine.
Not weird, just old fashioned.Gender segregation in friendships is becoming ever less important though, thankfully. At least in western nations.
Foremost I don't want even a hint of impropriety on my part even though all our friends know Luann and I are connected at the hip. The mindset set in me prolly started way when back with my Ex. I would get a 30 minute lecture for calling an 80 yr old customer "honey" when I would be calming her down about a technical equipment problem. That happened about 3200 times so it got drilled in my hard head. :(
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