complementing a braless lady
Avoid anything like, "Love your headlights!"
Seriously though, compliments are to bring two people closer together and should be treated as such. If you are attracted to a woman's beauty through her allowing you to see her breasts less-clothed, look her in the eye and smile and thank her for her choice of clothing, or comment directly on the outfit she's barely hiding her breasts behind or letting them fall out of.
"That color looks lovely on you," or "How becoming!"
"Where did you find that beautiful dress/top?"
"I would love to buy that outfit for my wife." Unless of course you are trying to get somewhere with her in a romantic sense and don't need to bring that part to her attention. Not that I'm judging an open marriage decision, but in most circumstances this compliment won't get you too far as a pick-up line.
Depending on the situation (bar, nightclub, grocery store, bar mitzvah), do not wait for her boyfriend/hubby to go to the bathroom and confront her with your compliment when she's momentarily alone; that's just creepyzone.
And for goodness sake, keep your fucking eyes on her face! If you can't control your gaze, stay the hell away until you can. It's no compliment if all you are doing is objectifying her titties. There's a human being behind those at-attention nipples. Respect the moment and leave it at a simple smile from a distance. If she enjoys the non-verbal from you, let her make the next move. There are approximately seven billion titty in this world and chances are you'll get to see more.
Socializing is a learned process, and some come to it more naturally than others. I tend to think that learning has mostly to do with how our parents and teachers and early friends interact with us. When we reach puberty, the lessons we've learned start to pay off - or not, if the lessons of pleasant interaction have been neglected or plain wrong. I think it did me well that from the age of six I grew up in a house full of women, and with that general lack of male influence around the home, I didn't have the father figure or older brother to teach me all the marginal pick-up lines that they may have used when getting out into the world.
There's a come-on and then there's a compliment. And given context, there is some gray area between the two comments. I don't do chat and Popsicle's story sounds like something he said in a chatroom, since it included a clothing reference. Do people actually have to put on clothes to chat in here? That seems outrageous and cray cray to me. I don't think I've ever had on a stitch of clothing as I type these long-winded responses some of you may have read or are reading now. Well, maybe I donned my robe a few mornings during this cold, seemingly unending winter. If clothes are required in the chat here I think someone in management's got cranial rectitus disease.
"If I told you that you have a nice body would you hold it against me?"
"How wonderful to see you. It would be so lovely to get to see more of you."
Which of these are a come-on and which is a compliment?
Trick question because they are both come-ons. The first one is more crass and certainly trite, but the second one is prompting the listener to remove their clothes.
One must be ever-vigilant with these unpredictable things called words, especially when they are meeting someone new, because they do not know what the other person's situation is. That woman Popsicle was trying to compliment may have just gotten out of an abusive relationship and is extra-sensitive about her body because her last partner verbally shamed her figure every day. Maybe the moderator knew this from past interactions and acted on his/her foreknowledge, chastising Popsicle to, "Be nice" in an attempt to keep comfortable what is most assuredly a waning commodity in True Nudists - a female! It would seem like a lovely compliment to give to a woman who is fresh from a verbally-abusive coupling, to playfully tell her that what's inside her pretty dress is appealing, wouldn't it? Not every nudist wants to be verbally disrobed by the first thing they hear from a virtual stranger.
But clothes in a nudist chatroom, oh come the hell on....
It sounded like a moderate rebuff to me, but I don't want to diminish the feelings that that verbal snub might have offered him. Again, context matters. Popsicle may have only recently been shot down in flames in a cruel way and is still smarting from his last experience.
The takeaway here is that we all fight with the language we are given, and with its inherent weaknesses and double meanings, we should always be extra sensitive to the words we use when dealing with the unknown behind every new meeting.
To a braless friend of mine, my comment was simply: "Well you look comfortable!" She immediately knew what I was alluding to, so she simply replied that she had been sunbathing nude in her backyard; and when she put on a bra she just found it uncomfortable and decided to "do without." I then added that it was good that she didn't feel the need to wear one and be uncomfortable.
I made no mention of her boobs bopping around under her shirt, or her "pokies"; because there was no reason to be that specific.
For me casual complements are nice. Nice look - nice outfit - nice top - you look very relaxed. Its often very obvious what they mean but its a nice non-objective way of saying things which sounds less creepy (especially if I dont know them too well). Close friends and things will often be more direct about complementing my braless breasts but obviously thats a bit different and one could take offence if it were given by a less well known acquaintance.
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