"Experts", "authorities" and otherwise opinionated people here on TN
I've been coming here for many years now (to my great shame lol!), and from time to time a self-proclaimed "authority" on all things nudist comes in and schools us "ignoramuses" on what nudist should be and shouldn't be about. I call them the nudism "SMEs."
It's an interesting thing; for someone to think their understanding of nudism is superior to others'. As if there was just one way to practice nudism.
Whenever I read "opinionated grand pronouncements", such as
- Clothing-optional resorts are BAD for nudism, or
- Nude-mandatory resorts are BAD for nudism, or
- Any kind of resort is BAD for nudism.
- One-eyed, one-legged dwarfs are BAD for nudism
I always wonder exactly where that is coming from. "Did you get kicked out or refused entry to a resort? " "Did someone tell your wife she had to be naked in the pool area or leave?" "Did a one-eyed, one-legged midget harass you at a resort?"
It often appears to me that there is some personal "beef" behind the "strong opinion." But what does that have to do with the rest of us?
But getting back to nudist "SME's." One of my nudist mentors would have qualified herself as a nudist SME. Amongst her many beliefs/values (and with all due respect) were that nudist women should sit in modest, ladylike fashion; and that shaving the pubes was in invitation for gawkers to look. So a woman who sat with her legs open and was shaven was basically an exhibitionist, and not being a nudist; in her book. How was sharing that "strong opinion" helpful to anyone?
Obviously, there is no such thing as a nudist SME, because there is not just "one nudist way." Personal preferences are exactly that. Personal. Not universal.
To use myself as an example (yet again); we go to a resort where everyone (or 99%) goes nude because it's "that kind of resort." My wife and I choose to remain naked the entire day; and so do our friends (with some pretty infrequent exceptions). Does that mean I think our experience is more "genuine" than others', who might not choose to not be naked "the entire time"? Of course NOT! My experience is personal, and only applies to the "small bubble" of the nudist environment I've chosen to practice nudism in. It's a great big nudist world out there, with many different variations in nudist environments. Whatever "bubble" one lives his/her best nudist life in is but a "fragment" of the big picture.
The issue with considering oneself a nudist SME, or touting "very strong opinions" on nudism; is that there is a fine line between that...and being a jackass.
That's not a "strong opinion", btw. It's just a thought. ;)
Your points are well-taken. As a result of what you call SME's nudism is dying to become a small niche thing. Here in the Midwest, it's fragmenting to three groups: 1) old school resorts which blatantly discriminate against single men 2) sex-focused heterosexual venues 3) gay and bi oriented adult male-only venues. The problem with this is that it leaves no place for children in nudism, at least unless chaperoned by a woman at an old school resort (which are geared more to retirees than kids). If kids aren't welcome as nudists they won't grow up to be nudists. End of story.
Secondly, nudism has an "ism" at the end that makes it a "a distinctive practice, system, or philosophy, typically a political ideology or movement." The non-nudist definition of nudism is very straight-forward, but there doesn't seem to be an accepted understanding or definition from nudists. Instead, it's a reflection of cultural values. People don't have anything in common just because they like to wear hats or no clothes.
Finally, nudist resorts and other private venues are not the face of nudism, but independently owned hospitality providers and event managers. If they insist that tattoos, body piercings or red hair are evil, then they are evil because they say so. If you don't like it you can argue at their gates, get a lawyer or just avoid them. As their customers age out, they're likely to find that the value of their business lies in the real estate rather than the venue and many are financially set as a result. The rest of us can just find other ways to be comfortable naked on our own terms.
The issue with considering oneself a nudist SME, or touting "very strong opinions" on nudism; is that there is a fine line between that...and being a jackass.That's not a "strong opinion", btw. It's just a thought. ;)
I agree with your points and also agree that any can have strong opinions in fact I will fight for the right anyone to have those strong opinions . But then IMO they should also understand that if they do come off looking like the kind of person you describe as a result of those strong opinions they should to own that too.
There are unqualified SMEs in just about every aspect of life, espousing their ideas for how everyone should do anything. As the second poster rightly notes, the only opinion that matters is yours and that of the venues rules maker, and if the two disagree, you move on. All else is just someone elses opinion, and if we could all learn a bit more empathy when encountering different opinions this world would be a much more pleasant place.
My first thought is that Subject Matter Experts (SMEs) are people that are purported distinguished in their field; Ive also read that these same experts dutifully note that they largely ignored. Uhhhhh, what has changed?
worntreads said:There are unqualified SMEs in just about every aspect of life, espousing their ideas for how everyone should do anything
I thought that being an unqualified SME was a prerequisite for engaging in online discussion.
I thought that being an unqualified SME was a prerequisite for engaging in online discussion.
Not in todays world, having zero experience is enough for some to present very strong opinions.
if we could all learn a bit more empathy when encountering different opinions this world would be a much more pleasant place.
Point taken but this is heavy lift when we operate in world of toxic individuality, where me and my are the precursor to social engagement. It doesnt allow leave room for the other side of empathy perspective taking.
It's certainly true, here as much as on the more infamous platforms, that conflict leads to engagement. And much of the conflict is essentially empty. It's said that 90% of conversation contains essentially no information - how are you, I am fine; nice dress you're wearing; is it raining where you are. And that's fine; we are social beings, and words that simply synchronize our rhythms and let us feel one another's presence are wonderful.
Conversation about serious questions is hard. I once visited a Bengali household for dinner. After dinner, our host led us (all the men, and the one non-Bengali woman; the Bengali women stayed in the kitchen) into the living room for conversation. He then asked what we might talk about. The topic of economic protectionism was suggested. And we talked about exactly that, from perspectives a world apart. No one recited talking points. Every thought was heard and considered.
I don't know that Westerners these days have any framework at all for a conversation like that. Conversations that purport to be about something seem to quickly become a team sport, engaging because of the excitement of reinforcing one's fellows and besting the opponents, as empty of meaning as talk of the weather.
I don't know that Westerners these days have any framework at all for a conversation like that. Conversations that purport to be about something seem to quickly become a team sport, engaging because of the excitement of reinforcing one's fellows and besting the opponents, as empty of meaning as talk of the weather.
This is extremely insightful. An apt description of the current social context and the dilemma of trying to have social discourse that doesnt mean converting the other person to you perspective.
It is astonishing how easily categorical statements are made with great certainty without engaging fully with the deeper aspects of what the OP said before twisting it back to their opinion.
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