Nudity and Openness Bonds A Friendship
The taboos toward nudity in the USA religious society is so silly. Having traveled to several other countries I have found that nudity and physical contact is just part of the norm in many other societies. Having experienced this for years I have tried ways to find other dudes in America who would be open and direct without any expectations and just show the love to one another in whatever ways they both agree on. Sex is not the binding aspect of any friendship but openness, communication, trust and faithfulness is what makes up a life long friend and guess could say the best friend. Anyone else want to comment on this?
"Just show the love to one another:" doesn't that mean sex or sexuality? I understand and respect your position, but recognize how certain words and phrases are red flags and just stop a conversation dead in its tracks. Bonding and trust-building take time, and once established help us to expand our boundaries. But fear is always in the background fighting against it. Fear is used in religion, particularly in the Bible Belt where you live, but politics, business and marketing are also peddlers of fear. Divide and conquer people and they're easier to control. Create enemies and it's easier to justify your goals as just and noble. The expression of this you describe in the US may be unique to the US, but the dynamics are universal.
I too have lived, worked and even voted in different countries. In doing so, we transcend normal boundaries, which gives us insight but may make us threatening for "not fitting in." In your case, you probably have felt tension and alienation for being gay and US military and global in your perspective living in a rural small town. In response, people scratch their heads at best or feel threatened at worst, a natural reaction. Often times people can't understand because they won't understand. But keep on being your beautiful self and things will shift. They have to because things change, for both good and bad. Sometimes we're the windshield, other times we're the bug stuck to it. But we keep on showing up, naked when we can, and all shall be well in some way or another.
"Just show the love to one another:" doesn't that mean sex or sexuality? I understand and respect your position, but recognize how certain words and phrases are red flags and just stop a conversation dead in its tracks. Bonding and trust-building take time, and once established help us to expand our boundaries. But fear is always in the background fighting against it. .
I think I know what the OP was talking about. Showing the love doesn't necessarily mean bringing sexuality into the picture. I've been in lots of organizations where I can truthfully say that I loved the other participants because of who they were, and what they brought into the relationship and the game, and how the activity we had in common formed a bond. If they died, I grieved. I think that's a kind of love, even though I seldom said "I love you" in normal conversations. When I think of those who passed on, I reflect that maybe I should have said it more.
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