Had a home a few years ago where I was a full-time nudist in my house & backyard. Over the years, I rented a room to different housemates. Some were nudists, some not. I made it clear in the beginning that I would ALWAYS be nude, even when they would invite guests to come over. Not once did I ever have a problem with a clothed person concerning my nudity. Thats because its all about how I behaved. Im so comfortable with my naked body, and doing normal, everyday things, that my conduct put (clothed) people at ease. I was very sexual when I lived there, but I kept a hard line between that and my everyday nudity. If it wasnt a sexual situation, then I didnt act like it, nor ever got aroused. I even demonstrated a sex toy for a clothed, mixed group, at their request. It would normally be used when a man had an erection, but since it wasnt a sexual situation, I didnt have one. I told many people that social nudity and sexual behavior are completely separate things. I also imparted this adage:
Social nudity is not about SEEING or being SEEN.
Its about BEING nude.
Replies
- MA
Aug 7, 2023Thank you for your description. Nudism is not about SEEING or being SEEN. Its about BEING nude. The question is when does exhibtionism or voyeurism start?
ReactReply - NU
Aug 9, 2023The proclamation that "Nudism is not about SEEING or being SEEN" is debatable IMHO.
Because I don't think we can dismiss the visual element in social nudity. For example when my wife sees that everyone is nude at the resort, she feels more comfortable with people seeing her naked as well. It's enjoyable to see our friends displaying confidence in their nudity - and they feeling the same way about me. It's about acceptance and appreciation more than "titillation."
I think for that idea to be more sensible you have to add "Nudism is not about SEEING or being SEEN - sexually." Because then it becomes something else that might not be about nudism.
ReactReply - MEMemberSep 20, 2023
Sexual thoughts, urges and activities are triggered by our neurological and glandular human functions. We were built this way. However, nudism is a choice. We may come to it in different ways, but I believe all of us feel exhilaration, self fulfillment and comradship. If our sexuality manifests itself during social nudity it's most likely to be our biology. Act as a lady or gentleman and all will be well with most fellow nudists.
ReactReply - PI
Sep 21, 2023I've learned we all are just sexual beings per se. So you can't switch sexuality off. But we can behave polite and adequate, depending on the social situation.
ReactReply - ST
Sep 21, 2023We host farm volunteers for periods from a week to a month, and let them know we're casual about nudity. Only the occasional visitor is really comfortable being naked. I used to be gradual about resuming my usual in-home nudity with such visitors around. But I've found, like the OP with his housemates, that the best thing is just to keep on with my regular habits, which fairly quickly lets the visitors understand that my nudity is, in no sense, about them, it's just me living my life. Does this mean I'm being "non-sexual"? Not at all. I'm a sexual being, drawing energy, ebbing and flowing, continually from my sexuality. My sexuality puts a spark in my eye showing my receipt to the tiny old woman checking my receipt at Walmart's door or walking past the farmworker stopping his weedwacker as I pass. But I do not, in the course of living as a sexual being, engage genitally with everyone I meet. No one does. To say that nudity is non-sexual just means that one is naked in a context where the nudityitselfis not meant or seen as a particular signal of sexual arousal, assertion, or availability. And the simplest, most reassuring way to manifest that is to follow the conventional definition of social nudity - to act, when naked, more or less as one would when clothed.ReactReply - MEMemberSep 21, 2023[quote] However, nudism is a choice. [/quote] Are you sure about that? I was "built" that way, born nude. I would say that putting something on is the choice. All the more reason nudity should be accepted by all humans. But as per the subject of this thread, sexual acts are a personal matter and should be kept personal. On the other hand, simple reminders that we are living sexual beings (like an erection) should not shock a fellow human being, especially ones that are used to seeing the natural human body.ReactReply
- NU
Sep 22, 2023[quote]Anyone else getting bored with old-school nudism and the recurring, ridiculous protestations of nudist asexuality? Whats wrong with sexual nudity anyway? Why does it have to be separate? We are sexual beings. Our sexuality isnt contained in our clothing, so it isnt removed when we remove our clothing. Its 2023 guys - sexuality has been emancipated. Get over it.[/quote] Short answer is, nothing if that's what the group norms are. But if they are the opposite then my view is either we respect them or don't participate in that environment or setting. Seems to me that is a reasonable idea both practically and ethically and gets the results that satisfy the most amount of people... no? Fighting against what's clearly a deeply held and inflexible stance that's important to someone else just ends up with the person fighting it miserable and angry with a bunch of pissed off people who have unjustifiably bad opinions of him. I respect their position without having to agree with it and as a result don't impose myself in their environment or show up at their gatherings. In the few instances where I have had to appear on business and community relations invitations I follow the rules established with exemplary attention. In reciprocal instances I have removed members from the organizations I was involved with when anonymous privileges had been extended to individuals who were part of strictly naturist organizations as well.ReactReply - NUSep 22, 2023[quote]We host farm volunteers for periods from a week to a month, and let them know we're casual about nudity. Only the occasional visitor is really comfortable being naked. I used to be gradual about resuming my usual in-home nudity with such visitors around. But I've found, like the OP with his housemates, that the best thing is just to keep on with my regular habits, which fairly quickly lets the visitors understand that my nudity is, in no sense, about them, it's just me living my life. Does this mean I'm being "non-sexual"? Not at all. I'm a sexual being, drawing energy, ebbing and flowing, continually from my sexuality. My sexuality puts a spark in my eye showing my receipt to the tiny old woman checking my receipt at Walmart's door or walking past the farmworker stopping his weedwacker as I pass. But I do not, in the course of living as a sexual being, engage genitally with everyone I meet. No one does. To say that nudity is non-sexual just means that one is naked in a context where the nudity itself is not meant or seen as a particular signal of sexual arousal, assertion, or availability. And the simplest, most reassuring way to manifest that is to follow the conventional definition of social nudity - to act, when naked, more or less as one would when clothed.[/quote] I think the problem is in that last sentence. Clothing and textile culture along with the objectification it produces and circulates results in a whole range of social behaviors and effects that are not holistic, intersubjective or nuanced. This is obviously not the case for you and having read your comments and regarded the wisdom therein I feel very certain about this evaluation but... the vast majority of us are still in process out of that space of distortion and repression and not yet at a place where unclothed conduct can or should mirror clothed conduct... in essence the excesses of one are mirrored in the repressions of the other. But... unpacking the idea "conventions of social nudity" is also for me the answer and solution to the dilemma. What is the social setting? Who is included or excluded? What are the rules either implied or explicit and what is our individual responsibility to them for everyone's sake? And careful attention to the self and others with humility humour charity and grace always for me are the best way forward. So I agree just getting long winded and detailed if anyone cares to read or needs the extras. Thank you for being you, as always.ReactReply
- ST
Sep 22, 2023[quote]Anyone else getting bored with old-school nudism and the recurring, ridiculous protestations of nudist asexuality?[/quote]
What makes you think naturists are asexual?
Thats not a way Id describe me or any of our naturist friends.
Definition.
Asexual A term used to describe someone who does not experience sexual attraction toward individuals of any gender
Is it because no one is sexually attracted to you, so you assume it the same for everyone?ReactReply - HO
Sep 22, 2023[quote]Anyone else getting bored with old-school nudism and the recurring, ridiculous protestations of nudist asexuality? What makes you think naturists are asexual? Thats not a way to Id describe me or any of our naturist friends. Definition. Asexual A term used to describe someone who does not experience sexual attraction toward individuals of any gender Is it because no one is sexually attracted to you, so you assume it the same for everyone?[/quote] Because that is how he and others like him try to justify and find cover for their libertine behavior while destroying the a way of life that predates them.ReactReply - HODec 15, 2023[quote]I've learned we all are just sexual beings per se. So you can't switch sexuality off. But we can behave polite and adequate, depending on the social situation.[/quote] This is the heart of the issue. It feels like some people want to behave in a sexual manner when it comes to nudity regardless of the context. In "polite" society it is understood that every behavior is not appropriate in every context. I think that applies to behavior while nude. It strikes me as odd that some can't seem to apply that rubric to nudism and naturism. Instead they insist in promoting the idea that non sexual nudity is prudish. That is nothing but a myth meant to diminish the opposing perspective.ReactReply
- MEMemberDec 26, 2023
This is excellent post about proper etiquette for being a nudist around others who may not be or are curious about it. Not everyone developes this. It took years for me to not get aroused when nude. It takes a lot of arousal focused attention to be hard in perticular settings cause of it but I consider it an evan trade off so that I am not making others in my company uncomfortable..
ReactReply - MEMemberJan 4, 2024
This is a really great post/topic and here is a womans point of view (which one of the posters asked for). Im a late nudist bloomer. I didnt come into this lifestyle until I was about 48. And I dont go nude all the time like I prefer to, but I very much enjoy being nude. So up until I was introduced to the nudist lifestyle, I always associated nudity to sex. Thats just how I was brought up. After meeting other nudists and learning more about the lifestyle, I have learned that being nude is not always associated with sexuality. I do know that there are some people who participate in social nudity and sex is involved. I have a nudist friend who has been to places like that (they did not know the place was like that until they went there). Anyway, to each their own. I am private with my sexuality. To me, sex is special and shared with your partner in private. I now understand that being a nudist and being nude in social situations is different from being nude and having sex. Most of my nude time is at home and in my backyard. And yes, I do get a bit of an arousal when Im nude at home (which Im always alone when nude at home). I love the feeling of the air and sun on my body. I have been to a nudist resort around other people and have NOT been aroused. For me, being around other nudists and my conversations with other nudists was no different than being around textiles. I never felt uncomfortable or awkward. People at this resort were welcoming and friendly. I think there are some people who want to make it known that nudity does not always have to be associated with sex, especially the nudist who would like nudity to be normalized.
ReactReply - 2B
Jan 4, 2024I to find a big difference between social nudity and sexual nudity. I have enjoyed being nude most of my life, I like the feeling of the sun and breeze on my skin, and just being nude is for me expressive, a little rebellious too. Social nudity connects you to others in an intimate way that is quite special, but in no way sexual at all, but maybe a little primal. Social nudity is freedom to be your very basic self in a "garden of Eden" setting. Sexual nudity has it's place, but not in social nudity.
ReactReply - MEMemberJan 4, 2024
It's not about what we're thinking or feeling it's about the way we behave (act) is the difference.
When nude and in a social setting don't do or say anything that you wouldn't if you were clothed. We all have different barriers in this regard so the emphasis here is reading the room and acting in accordance with the group settingReactReply - NU
Jan 4, 2024I have had no difficulty separating social nudity from sexual issues. A topic has been explored about getting erect and the production of precum, but I haven't had experience with either in simple nudist situations. To get erect for me requires sexual stimulation that doesn't occur from simple nude encounters in nudist situations.
ReactReply - WI
Jan 4, 2024There's no such thing as too much -- until, of course, there's chafing or rug burns... ; ) [quote]I think this is about nudity in front of others... and as for sexuality, of course all people have sex, maybe I have too much, heh, heh.[/quote]ReactReply - NA
Jan 5, 2024This seems to be an excellent and balanced discussion - and a very important one. In Western society, especially in the US, there is a (too) close a connection between nudity and sex. The commercial arena and the notion that "sex sells" undermine the fact that social nudity and sexual nudity CAN be separated (the subject here). Of course, we are sexual beings whether nude or textiled. The question articulated very well by a few here is how we behave and respect the environment where we are at a given point. If we are in a swingers' club (not my thing) and sexual nudity is the norm for that situation, people are expected to behave in one way. If we are in a social nudist setting, especially a family setting, we behave very differently. If I am in the woods alone or with accepting friends, I will be naked (weather permitting). When I am at the supermarket, I will be clothed. Context matters.
ReactReply - MI
Jan 5, 2024[quote]When I am at the supermarket, I will be clothed. Context matters.[/quote] Plus, most supermarkets are too cool for comfortable nudity!ReactReply - STJan 5, 2024
Some anthropologists would say supermarkets are why humans started to wear clothes.
ReactReply - KO
Jan 6, 2024As far as this is concerned, it doesn't matter what we might think, what counts is the way other people, behave and think about things. If people don't want to see me nude, they'll look another way. If someone doesn't like me being totally shaved, tough. I can separate social nudity from sexual nudity, if someone else does want sex with me, I'll consider it. If she wants to experience social nudity with me, we can do that as well. Stupid to think that while a lady might be sexually attracted to a nude male, for any reason, another male shouldn't be similarly attracted. Come up with your own answer and then the world will be in the normal balance.
ReactReply - MIJan 6, 2024[quote]Some anthropologists would say supermarkets are why humans started to wear clothes. I think you're right on this point. The evidence points to it all starting with shoes and shirts - No shoes no shirt no service![/quote] I rarely wear a shirt in the summer except in places that require them.ReactReply
- JE
Jan 26, 2024[quote]Anyone else getting bored with old-school nudism and the recurring, ridiculous protestations of nudist asexuality? Whats wrong with sexual nudity anyway? Why does it have to be separate? We are sexual beings. Our sexuality isnt contained in our clothing, so it isnt removed when we remove our clothing. Its 2023 guys - sexuality has been emancipated. Get over it.[/quote] Very well said. nudity and sexuality are both our natural form. Clothing was constructed to cover our skin for sexual denial. We, and I mean me, as a nudist are shedding that archaic concept and embrace the totality of who I am as well as all of those around me, and especially those I would call my friends. That being said, we all should still be respectful of others. That does not mean that we deprive ourselves of everything just in case one thing "may" offend someone. I challenge you to go about your day, and never do ANYTHING that could possibly offend ANYONE. It is literally impossible. The best thing is to read the room. Gauge your behaviors based on those close to you. Push the limits a bit, and if you get a negative reaction, then adjust accordingly or move to another area or group. Surround yourself with like minded people.ReactReply