New Here, not sure if I belong
Hi ,
Im Chris and I'm new to this site.
Please read my entire post and feel free to make comments , answer some of my questions , give points of view etc.. im new here and welcome different opinions and points of view. Im also looking for some answers to questions I have. Please take nothing I say personally , or offensively as I do not mean to insult or even question someone else's view or opinion.
First a little about me, Im a mid 40's, heathy , attractive , in shape normal male by all accounts.
Im financially secure, probably on the affluent side as I am retired and live very well.
I am also happily married and enjoy a very healthy sex life
I have always enjoyed being nude., I am very comfortable in my own skin , I get a feeling of freedom, relaxation and I crave my nude time when I haven't been in awhile.
I own a lot of property and it is very private. I basically wear clothing around my home and property only when its appropriate and for protection from the elements. Other than that im always nude. My wife doesn't "get" the nudity thing the way I do. Living privately , she swims nude , sunbathes nude , and doesn't have a problem walking around the house nude or anything like that but she doesn't "need" it like me.
Like I said im mid 40's and this is the first time ive considered seeking out like minded people. I googled nudists and found this site. I first went to the rules and ettiquite area , then to the forum area. I read some posts from other new members and then kept browsing.
I started to read some posts under "Sex and Sexuality" and thats when I started to question my own "nudity" , my place in a society like this one etc.. etc..
I read a post from a gentleman , appropriately placed in a forum titled "Sex and Sexuality" and I read post after post from i guess, self appointed "purists" , who judged, lamb basted, and accused him of not being as "elite" or "pure" a nudist as themselves.
Claiming there is no room for sex or sexuallity in nudism..? What??
Im a healthy , sexually active , normal male. When I see an attractive woman , I notice!
The female form is attractive to me, when I see an attractive woman, nude or not , the human brain releases endorphins and other chemicals that trigger physical reactions in the body.
So my questions start here ... are nudists supposed to be non-sexual beings?
Are only people who dont find other humans attractive , and have no sexual feelings towards those people ( whether or not its acted on) welcome in such communities?
Are erections taboo??
Are erections forbidden?
Am I really not a nudist ? (I guess you need thelabel to be accepted?)
Am I not "pure" enough ?
Or the big question am I "Truenudists" material?
I really dont need the drama or BS , so please , if all nudists pretend there is no sex or sexuallity in nudism(which would make it truly an anomaly in the world) tell me now..and I'll stay the hell away. Lol
Thanks for reading
Chris
Hi Chris. Welcome to the site; I hope you enjoy it. We nudists are as sexually active as any other otherwise diverse group, and although they may not admit it, most of us enjoy naked people watching. Of course that doesn't mean that we are constantly lusting after each other. Be believe that society's rules prohibiting overt public sexual activity are entirely appropriate. Our cherished public clothing optional beaches are constantly threatened be a few nudist pretenders who think that the laws prohibiting public sexual activity don't apply there. Many outsiders, who we call textiles, believe that we all practice nudism only to engage in promiscuous asexual activities. doing so would provide those who oppose our lifestyle with sufficient ammunition to use against us to ban public nude recreation. We believe that our lifestyle is worthy of respect and that while in nude venues we must act respectably. If you share our philosophy then we welcome you to our world. If not maybe you should reconsider. Of course not everyone here will agree with what I've said, but we are a very diverse group, and we enjoy being clothes free while having different opinions about almost everything else.
There are in fact several levels of nudism. Not all nudists are the same. Some people are what may be referred to as activity nudists. There are certain activities that they may engage in, that they prefer to do nude. These activities include swimming, sun bathing and possibly sleeping. This may describe your wife. She is by definition a nudist in regards to these activities because she prefers to do them nude. Then there are the home nudists or private nudists like your self. These are people who prefer to be nude when ever they can in the privacy of their own home or yard. Finally there are the social nudists who prefer to be nude and socialize with other nudists. Nudists are not exhibitionists. Their goal in being nude is their own comfort and peace of mind and not to be seen. Nudists also conform to the norms of society with regards to social interaction and sex. Nudists are not swingers. Although some individuals may be both a nudist and a swinger, it is not the generally accepted behavior for nudists. One rule we have for our nude gatherings is that everybody goes home with the person they came with. We cannot completely remove sex from our lives but nudists treat it the same way society in general treats it. We mostly ignore it.
Well said, DesertRat. And Babaloo, yes, you do belong. Welcome! We come in all types, sizes, varieties, preferences, and all have differing ideas of what nudism is all about. If we were all the same it would be boring as hell!
Welcome from another person who's uncertain about labels, where I belong, and so on!
There've been some pretty thoughtful responses to your post already. If I were to add anything regarding nudism/naturism and sexuality, it would be that I always ask myself "Would X be appropriate behaviour in the same situation if we were all clothed right now?"
For example:
Is it okay to appreciate someone's form? Yes, and that's something we do inside our own heads.
Is it okay to gawk at someone? Under most circumstances, no.
Is it okay to walk around town pitching a tent? Then why would it be at a clothing optional beach? (Yes, boners happen clothed or no, and we all deal with them as discreetly as possible.)
I think that in getting naked around other people we confront a lot of our internalized shame and embarrassment, and that's hard to do. I think that some people who enjoy being naked sometimes get so concerned about the perception of nudity as sexual (and I sure include me in this) that they lose sight of whether a certain behaviour is just generally acceptable behaviour. (Also, there seems to be a lot of tension over the whole nudists vs. swingers thing that I, frankly, don't know the context for.) When I see that boil to the surface I try to just scroll down and read the next post.
are nudists supposed to be non-sexual beings?
No. Nudists are supposed to be sexual beings just like the rest of society. Nudism is (mostly) about doing what you'd normally do, but doing it without clothes. Like gardening? Do it naked. Like boating? Do it naked. Like playing volleyball? Do it naked. Like reading, watching movies, drinking beer & talking politics? Do them naked.
But nudism is not an excuse to engage in sexual activity in front of a bunch of other people. If you were at a cook out with a bunch of friends, would it be acceptable to start getting it on with your wife or with another couple? No. A hug, a kiss, a subtle caress - yes. But not open blatant sex.
And that is where nudism has a big divide. Some people think, "Hey, we're all naked! Let's get it on! All the parts are out and ready for action! Free love!" But that attitude is not nudism/naturism. It's not. No. It's not.
There are those who say since nudists have thrown out the prohibition on nudity, they ought to also throw out the prohibition on public sex. That is something other than nudism/naturism. It just is. Words have meanings. Nudism & naturism mean NON-SEXUAL social nudity. Sometimes that non-sexual line gets pushed far to the non- side in an effort to hold at bay those who want to embrace the sexual side.
As it's almost impossible to live as naturists 24/7 we have to belong to both the textile world and the naturist world.
We have to follow the rules, standards and etiquette for both worlds, but it's not difficult to swap between the two, we all manage it easily.... Because those rules and standards and ettiquette are exactly the same.
Are erections inappropriate?
Let's put one into a textile situation, you are at a business meeting, the gentleman giving the presentation has a clearly obvious erection under his trousers, there are women and men at the meeting. He is walking back and forth with his pelvis thrust out.... Is this appropriate?
A naturist is just a textile without clothes, and just as sexual, only idiots think that the rules change when the clothes come off.
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