Guy Camaraderie
Closeness among guys is central to GC. Hello! My name's Ryan, the founder of Guy Camaraderie. We welcome guys from any background. Whether you identify as straight, gay, bi, or otherwise, there are no expectations or criticisms here. Please allow me to give you a brief overview of the core concepts and philosophy of Guy Camaraderie (or GC for short). The central focus once again is closeness...
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Compliments
Return to DiscussionsGuys are not as free with their compliments of each other as women are, but I have had men, who were total strangers, tell me I have a great beard. It happens once in a while, but it's not common. I've heard guys compliment each other on their haircuts. I don't think it's too much of a stretch that one man could compliment another man's hands or face. I'm pretty certain that positive comments about biceps, pecks, or abs would also be well-appreciated.
But what would happen if, in the locker room, one man said to another,
"Nice set of low-hangers" or
"Nicely shaped mushroom" or
"Great cock" or
"Very pleasing set of equipment"
Etc?
This topic came to mind because a guy sent me images of himself wearing some new jewelry he recently purchased. The jewelry was very nice and I said so. But his cock and balls are well-formed, visually pleasing, attractive, and, quite frankly, very beautiful -- and I told him so. My compliment was quite well-received.
But it got us talking about how men seem so frightened about discussing or complimenting another man's cock and balls. Are we that insecure? Are we afraid to give and received compliments regarding our male sex organs?
Now, understand, none of us did anything to deserve or merit the cock-and-balls set we got. We simply have the set we were given and that's it. There is nothing we have done, could do now, or could have done to change the set we have. From that perspective, we have no cause for pride or shame.
Nonetheless, some sets are decidedly more shapely, visually pleasing, handsome and attractive. Is either man harmed when one acknowledges this in the other?
There's a men's-only clothing-optional resort near where I live. Although it's perfectly acceptable to wear clothing anywhere and everywhere throughout the resort, a good deal of the men take advantage of the fact that they are not required to do so. At that resort, compliments on male equipment flow freely. Low hangers seem to be almost universally appreciated. A good stiff dick elicits a flood of compliments.
Why is this essentially unheard in any other context?
I agree with you -- there's no reason we shouldn't be able to compliment other men and receive compliments from them. Unfortunately, I think a lot of men who aren't secure in their sexuality will feel threatened by comments like those. They'll think, "hey, why's he looking at my cock?" Even if we're complimenting them on other body parts like biceps or abs, some guys will consider that to be a sexual overture. Not sure why that is.
Of course, a lot of it depends on the guy and how well you know him. I've got straight friends that I could say to them, "Hey, you've been working out. It looks good on you!" and they wouldn't feel threatened in the least. But that's going to depend a lot on the guy you're complimenting.
Do I wish it was different? Absolutely. Am I overly cautious? Maybe so. But yeah, I usually avoid making comments like those unless I know the guy is gay or I know him really well.
I agree that this is a huge portion of it.Unfortunately, I think a lot of men who aren't secure in their sexuality will feel threatened by comments like those.
Men who are secure in their sexuality are not going to be bothered by compliments directed at their bodies in general and their sexual equipment specifically.
And I don't believe it matters where the man is on the spectrum from purely straight to purely gay. If he's secure about where he is on that spectrum, then compliments are not going to bother him.
I've received compliments on my bread, I'm ok with it and even proud that I've grown one. Years ago I couldn't so now it's great to do so. I have no problem with compliments about what I've chosen to do to myself that others like, they acknowledge the effort it has taken especially in my physique. Things like haircut style, my physique tone body or even what clothing I choose to wear gives one confidence of what and who we are. Now to get comments about color of hair, eyes, skin type or color, that I view in a different way than giving me confidence of who I am. Those are likes, what guys like. We all like different things on other guys which comes from a personal choice we make about another guy. Just look at the comments on guys pics. "Your handsome", well not to me you may say to yourself, what was he thinking?! Like I wrote, it's about what we like to see.
Now comments about my genitals I take it as, "hey it's what I was given, I had no say in it". I view it as my color of my skin, skin type, eye color or any other physique parts that I can't change without surgery of some type. I for the longest took those compliments are 'what are they after?' I can say I viewed it thru my experience of my rape and how I viewed men. I now see it as it's their way of saying 'I like what I see' . We all have likes on other guys and we need to be comfortable with our feelings. Now depending on how we feel about ourselves will depend on how we act on those feelings. How have guys acted when giving me compliments on genitals? If it's at a social atmosphere like social nude parties of just guys or mix gender nudist places, those compliments seldom happen. At gyms or spas and even nude beaches that are mostly guys, then it's about 75% sexual in nature that they are exploring if your open to much more than just looking. I've had some intense conversations and yes most are looking for sexual pleasure there at the gym/spa or to take it somewhere els
Of course I like it when people agree with me and tell me I'm totally right about something.I've received compliments on my bread, I'm ok with it and even proud that I've grown one. Years ago I couldn't so now it's great to do so. I have no problem with compliments about what I've chosen to do to myself that others like, they acknowledge the effort it has taken especially in my physique. Things like haircut style, my physique tone body or even what clothing I choose to wear gives one confidence of what and who we are. Now to get comments about color of hair, eyes, skin type or color, that I view in a different way than giving me confidence of who I am. Those are likes, what guys like. We all like different things on other guys which comes from a personal choice we make about another guy. Just look at the comments on guys pics. "Your handsome", well not to me you may say to yourself, what was he thinking?! Like I wrote, it's about what we like to see.Now comments about my genitals I take it as, "hey it's what I was given, I had no say in it". I view it as my color of my skin, skin type, eye color or any other physique parts that I can't change without surgery of some type. I for the longest took those compliments are 'what are they after?' I can say I viewed it thru my experience of my rape and how I viewed men. I now see it as it's their way of saying 'I like what I see' . We all have likes on other guys and we need to be comfortable with our feelings. Now depending on how we feel about ourselves will depend on how we act on those feelings. How have guys acted when giving me compliments on genitals? If it's at a social atmosphere like social nude parties of just guys or mix gender nudist places, those compliments seldom happen. At gyms or spas and even nude beaches that are mostly guys, then it's about 75% sexual in nature that they are exploring if your open to much more than just looking. I've had some intense conversations and yes most are looking for sexual pleasure there at the gym/spa or to take it somewhere els
But I like it even more when someone presents a different perspective -- even if it casts some doubt on what I said.
If someone has an especially attractive skin color, I really want to tell them how much I like it, but I rarely, if ever, make any such comment. Because, unless the person had some specific skin-color treatment done, their skin color is simply what they got. And the same is true about sex organs.
So, it would seem to complimenting a guy on his shapely cock and balls is not going to be received any better than compliments on other aspects over which the person has no control.
However, I'm coming from the perspective of trying to counter all of the male shaming that goes on.
Men should shave their faces.
Dicks should not be seen.
Even if it's a context in which dicks are acceptable, they had better be fully flaccid.
Anything that is specifically male/masculine is bad, shameful, should be hidden.
Maybe if we could change the culture among men -- that would at least be a start.
Guys are not as free with their compliments of each other as women are, but I have had men, who were total strangers, tell me I have a great beard. It happens once in a while, but it's not common. I've heard guys compliment each other on their haircuts. I don't think it's too much of a stretch that one man could compliment another man's hands or face. I'm pretty certain that positive comments about biceps, pecks, or abs would also be well-appreciated.But what would happen if, in the locker room, one man said to another,"Nice set of low-hangers" or"Nicely shaped mushroom" or"Great cock" or"Very pleasing set of equipment"Etc?This topic came to mind because a guy sent me images of himself wearing some new jewelry he recently purchased. The jewelry was very nice and I said so. But his cock and balls are well-formed, visually pleasing, attractive, and, quite frankly, very beautiful -- and I told him so. My compliment was quite well-received.But it got us talking about how men seem so frightened about discussing or complimenting another man's cock and balls. Are we that insecure? Are we afraid to give and received compliments regarding our male sex organs?Now, understand, none of us did anything to deserve or merit the cock-and-balls set we got. We simply have the set we were given and that's it. There is nothing we have done, could do now, or could have done to change the set we have. From that perspective, we have no cause for pride or shame.Nonetheless, some sets are decidedly more shapely, visually pleasing, handsome and attractive. Is either man harmed when one acknowledges this in the other?There's a men's-only clothing-optional resort near where I live. Although it's perfectly acceptable to wear clothing anywhere and everywhere throughout the resort, a good deal of the men take advantage of the fact that they are not required to do so. At that resort, compliments on male equipment flow freely. Low hangers seem to be almost universally appreciated. A good stiff dick elicits a flood of compliments.Why is this essentially unheard in any other context?
I decided at 13 that instead of allowing myself to express negative thoughts about other men I would only express positive thoughts genuinely offered to other men to model the way that I feel it which would be most constructive and affirmative. I love to offer compliments and praise
Thankfully, this seems to be fairly common among men.I decided at 13 that instead of allowing myself to express negative thoughts about other men I would only express positive thoughts genuinely offered to other men to model the way that I feel it which would be most constructive and affirmative. I love to offer compliments and praise
At the men's resort I'm always talking about, at least 75% of the guys are nude. That's a lot of cocks and balls swinging around out in the open. Not everyone has an ideal set -- you get what you get.
Although compliments flow fairly freely, I've never heard comments like:
"Now there's a tiny pee-pee; who are you going to please with that?"
"Wow! That's very badly misshapen; were you in an accident?"
"Do you even have a scrotum?"
It would seem that guys are very much aware of the fact that they didn't do anything to deserve or merit the set of cock and balls they have. They recognize that they have the set they were given. Nothing they did, nothing they could have done, nothing they could do will change that.
Hand out compliments where they are due, but never shame a man because the set he got does not conform to the porn-star ideal.
I've gotten a couple positive comments about my penis tattoo in public areas. While they didn't exactly mention my penis, it's obvious where their eyes have been when they say, cool ink (or tattoo) but that must have hurt. At nudist parties and venues I get a lot more comments on all my tattoos and piercings, as well as some positive things like your body looks great. Do you exercise? And in more private situations, I've gotten things like, nice ass, love how your dick tattoo grows when you get erect. I like them all!
I want to live in society in which a compliment is just a compliment.I've gotten a couple positive comments about my penis tattoo in public areas. While they didn't exactly mention my penis, it's obvious where their eyes have been when they say, cool ink (or tattoo) but that must have hurt. At nudist parties and venues I get a lot more comments on all my tattoos and piercings, as well as some positive things like your body looks great. Do you exercise? And in more private situations, I've gotten things like, nice ass, love how your dick tattoo grows when you get erect. I like them all!
Ny ioubuib us that we still live in a prudish society where we are never to even talk about another guys cock and balls or ass or nudity! It is only in TN and at some unique places that we can come up to a guy and say great genitals, etc., or even shake his cock in your hand as a gesture of good will for we nudist guys that absolutely love being nude and would love another guy shaking our dicks! HAH!
Hickguy M.D.
I was in a setting once where three of us guys were having dinner at the apartment of one of the other guys. Naturally, we were each nude. When we finished dinner and got up to move to the living area for conversation, the host said something to me about my cock. Honestly, I did not really hear or understand what he said, but I could tell from the context, the tone of his voice, and the look on his face that whatever he actually said was a compliment. I took it the way I would take any other compliment and said, "Thanks!" None of us felt weird, at least I certainly did not. It was just a compliment. Maybe part of it is that most of us are not naked with other people as often as we are with others clothed so that compliments about normally hidden areas just don't come up. My experience has led me to believe that if I am in a nude setting with others, I will try to be free to make a compliment when one is due. Now, I may be wrong, but I think it would be even less accepted if one were to offer a compliment to a nudist lady about her lady parts, even when one were due. I think I will limit my compliments to guys until I know the particular lady well enough to know how she will take it. As for shaking my cock by way of greeting, I would love it!