Guy Camaraderie
Closeness among guys is central to GC. Hello! My name's Ryan, the founder of Guy Camaraderie. We welcome guys from any background. Whether you identify as straight, gay, bi, or otherwise, there are no expectations or criticisms here. Please allow me to give you a brief overview of the core concepts and philosophy of Guy Camaraderie (or GC for short). The central focus once again is closeness...
- created by A_Free_Spirit
Touch Practice
Return to DiscussionsSo the other day on the internet I was reading about if it's okay for men to cuddle naked or shirtless (short answer: yes with mutual understanding) and it makes me pose this question:
Anyone ever heard of or ever tried this thing called touch practice? It's more than just a hug and cuddle, but just touching and becoming more intimate with another man in a non sexual way that can bring you two closer together...almost like breaking down any wall you may have built.
I think it's an awesome concept that I would love trying one day with someone who would be open to it.
never heard of Touch Practice, but it sounds like something i would love to try with another man, especially if both of us were naked. it wouldn't even bother me if the other guy got an erection either, especially since i would probably get one myself anyway lol.
I was at a clothing optional resort, and struck up a friendship with a guy whose campsite was across from mine. We shared an interest in hiking, so off we went on the trails. As we chatted on the trail, the topic came up that touch is important for healthy human interaction. I can be a touchy feely guy, and he seemed to indicate the same. Finally he worked up the courage to give me a good sideways shoulder hug, which I received graciously. Then he acted mildly embarrassed for his forwardness. Earlier in the conversation it came up that Im married, and hes single. I got to thinking he may benefit from more than just a shoulder hug. So when we got to the top of the hill, I turned to him and said there was more to me than that. I gave him a full-on frontal embrace. I held him while I waited for a signal to say it was enough. It didnt come right away, so I gripped him tighter. Finally I said, Are you done? Yes, he says, but still held on. Are you sure? He didnt answer, so I didnt let go. This wasnt my plan, but it seemed right at the time. After a while I asked again, and a couple more times after that, and got the same responses. We stood there in each others arms for a good ten minutes. No erections. No sex. Finally his grip loosened, we let go, and continued our hike, but with a different topic for discussion.
That kind of physical contact has a mental/emotional affect. It was certainly a kind of male bonding experience. We hung out the rest of the day. The next morning we went our separate ways. When I got home I found myself being clingy with my wife. She had no idea why, but clearly noticed it, and thought it was a bit funny. To this day, when I think of him, I feel compelled to go hug my wife, fully clothed or not.
The idea has been around for many many years, sometimes under different names. From my perspective, I think it is very valid and reasonable. It allows two men to bond and feel comfortable with each other and takes away barriers created by society. And, being a man, an erection may occur... So What! That is natural and part of being a man. Why should we try to hide or be embarrassed by a natural physical reaction?
I would cuddle, share a bed, or touch anyone visiting or that I visit and I would not consider it a sexual move or encounter.
Amen to all that has been said. We should all feel free to be more 'touchy' with our male friends. I know I don't hesitate to give my male friends a hug, naked or not. :-))
It's good to be able to hug one's male friends. It's so much more than just shaking hands.
It's such a unique journey for most men, because most of us have similar trajectories if not life stories and similar inhibitions. Being able to hug a male friend naked solely to connect with the other and give the undeniable support that comes from relaxing and letting go is powerful. Fear of intimacy in this kind of sharing is bogged down in totally unfounded social norms and mores that we have internalized. But the lack of it socially also hinders our ability to offer it to a partner as well.
Thank you for some powerful sharing and insight. You share your experience as a gay man, but it is universal to all men, for we all need the touch you describe. In this regards, maybe the only difference we have as men is that some are more afraid of penises, bodies and other men in general. I also grew up in a strict Protestant community where the most intimacy shared could be pyramid hugs with shoulders touching but that was never between men. I lost three friends before age 25 from a relatively small group a hiking accident, a drunken driving crash and a suicide, and two others suffered mental breakdowns they never recovered from. Could touch have saved them? Im not sure. Personally I believe that naked intimate touch is closer to the hands-on action and difference-making that Jesus preached rather than the shame and guilt laden teachings we received and suffered from.