Male Bonding2
For those who like to explore the concept and dynamics of male bonding. Men are socialized in different ways in different societies, and so many men would like to have close male friendships, yet after spending time establishing a career, primary relationship and live in general, find themselves without close male friends. Many of us want male friends with whom we can share openly without...
- created by AZdesertman
What is the ultimate activity whilst male bonding?
Return to DiscussionsEveryone seems to skirt round the topic, but I think the ultimate activity that really bonds people together is the curiosity about what the other guy does with his penis when its aroused. Is there anything wrong about a couple of guys masturbating in each others presence?
There are so many things that constitute male bonding to me and it centers around shared experiences and vulnerability. As guys we don't always have to talk a lot. Sometimes just being with someone while doing some activity, anything from watching sports or TV to building something is enough. But when we are freed to be ourselves and to be vulnerable in a safe environment I feel bonding can be at a deeper level. Talking about our fears, our triumphs, our daily slog and hearing from others about theirs. And of course, a good naturedly poking at each other's challenges and insecurities. Nudity removes another barrier. If you feel safe naked with others you've already got a good start toward deeper bonding opportunities. Sharing and expressing our sexuality, whether guys identify as gay, straight, or otherwise, is of course one type of activity as others have said. I've also had deeply meaningful conversations sitting naked outside around a table or fire pit with some drinks or cigars. The freedom to be vulnerable in a safe environment is the key for me.
I agree Nakedandie! I see nothing wrong with two guys pleasuring themselves. I haven't had that opportunity recently but I look forward to sharing some ultimate male bonding this year with cool friends that I've made here on TN. Great topic and I look forward to hearing other meaningful responses like those shared by Lucas and VdkaShaker!
Re experiencing our sexuality in a way that has no labels or guilt attached.what is the line that we should be careful not to cross if remaining true to our spouse and also ensuring there is no guilt attached.
Completely agree. We all need integrity in the important relationships in our lives as well as within ourselves. If sexual sharing is a line established by a couple it should not be crossed. I've found in my life that drawing lines and never revisiting them can be hazardous in the long run. I prefer to advocate for continuing communication on "difficult" topics in relationships. People evolve and change.
That said, I read the context of your quoted selection to be more about where men see themselves on a sexual spectrum. Sharing your sexuality with a man in some way does not make you gay or bi and doesn't need to be attached to labels like that.
Re experiencing our sexuality in a way that has no labels or guilt attached.what is the line that we should be careful not to cross if remaining true to our spouse and also ensuring there is no guilt attached.
Perhaps if we are likely to feel guilty about some sexual activity that our spouse or partners knowing nothing of, we should masturbate ourselves in the presence of a male who is bonding with us, but refrain from touching each other? just an idea!!!
I kindof agree with SoloMojo. Masturbation is a form of bonding but it is certainly not a "higher" form of bonding. Masturbation is perhaps the weakest form of bonding that ever existed.
One of the worst relationships I ever had was with a guy I masturbated with. As soon as we were done masturbating, he hated me. I didn't do anything to cause him to hate me. He simply hated me because once we'd masturbated, we'd completed all the bonding he wanted. He did not want a relationship.
Every time I've met someone who wanted to masturbate together, not one of them wanted a relationship. What they actually wanted was a high, like getting drunk. Like an addict, the masturbator obsessed about getting high and did not care about bonding at all. The only reason they wanted to do it together is so they could lie to themselves and call it bonding.
Everyone seems to skirt round the topic, but I think the ultimate activity that really bonds people together is the curiosity about what the other guy does with his penis when its aroused. Is there anything wrong about a couple of guys masturbating in each others presence?
I think some of you are missing the point here.... we are talking about NAKED male bonding. I agree that male bonding requires something more than masturbation to make us bond. But if we're going to bond on activities such as walking, house building, museums etc there's no need to be naked. But when being naked is involved then it's a different ball game. Because now we're showing to the other guy our sex organs and testicles. And our penises have a tendency to vary in size from small and soft to big and hard. We will naturally then in the bonding process want to see what another guy does with his sex organ. And to see him rub it and bring on an orgasm whilst I do the same with my penis makes us vulnerable but also bonds us in that act.
Everyone seems to skirt round the topic, but I think the ultimate activity that really bonds people together is the curiosity about what the other guy does with his penis when its aroused. Is there anything wrong about a couple of guys masturbating in each others presence?
I tend to agree with those who say masturbation is on the lower end of male bonding. I masturbate with men sometimes on cam and it seems almost meaningless as once we have both climaxed there is really no conversation after, not even a 'hey great cum shot'. When I think of male bonding I think it has to do with being so comfortable with them you let your guard down and if the masturbarion happens As a result of having a great conversation then afterwards you will still be chatting and hanging out. We are men; sexual creatures. Gay or straight we all look at each others dicks, and even the most 'hetero' dude will get aroused if he sees a dick erect. The point is most men already have their agendas when it comes to male bonding; it just boils down to common interests and what makes you happy.
I saw this thread yesterday and am liking the way it is progressing. While I'm the first one to enjoy a good masturbation session with a buddy or three, and it can be a bit of a bonding experience, I whole-heartedly agree that the real bonding comes through talking, opening up and sharing, showing not just our vulnerability to another male, but also trusting them, sharing and not judging. Often physical contact can be a part of that, though I don't believe it is generally sexual, but more brotherly--comforting and adding to the emotional connection that is being built. It usually isn't tough to find someone willing to stroke out a load (on cam, in person, or otherwise)...but finding someone willing to REALLY BUILD a deep, binding friendship, the trust necessary for another man to feel safe in opening up and expressing his true self is a colossal challenge, and rarely happens. Many men say they want that, but when it comes down to actually reaching out and building it, even many of those shy away, aren't comfortable with the closeness and emotional intimacy, and run the other direction.Keep up this kind of conversation and sharing, though. THIS is what this group is supposed to be about........ THANKS MEN!!
I am more in line with this idea. I think it is even deeper than conversation, I think it is intimacy, which can just be hanging out in a room together silently. I think there is nothing more intimate then sharing silence with another person. WOW