Male Bonding2
For those who like to explore the concept and dynamics of male bonding. Men are socialized in different ways in different societies, and so many men would like to have close male friendships, yet after spending time establishing a career, primary relationship and live in general, find themselves without close male friends. Many of us want male friends with whom we can share openly without...
- created by AZdesertman
Men showing affection
Return to DiscussionsI've long observed that when two women see each other, or upon parting, do so with a hug and even a kiss, on the cheek and often on the lips. (My wife is one of those types of people.)
But when two guys do it, well it makes people uncomfortable. Even a clothed, platonic hug between two guys often draws stares.
Why is that? And why does there seem to be such a stigma against it.
I wish we could get to where two guys could greet each other with affection. I'm not talking sexual necessarily, but even just good friendship.
I think nudist men are more open to that type of thing, at least in my experience. We're already nude together, which breaks down many barriers. Showing care and affection for another naked guy just seems natural in those situations.
What does everyone think? Am I off my rocker, or should we be hopeful that, at least among nudists, we men can be more open with each other.
I have never seen anything wrong with guys giving or receiving friendly hugs. Being a very tactile person I love giving and receiving hugs, it's a normal way to show your friends that you are glad to see them, or enjoyed their company when they depart. I'm talking about a nice hug, not grabbing one by the ass and rubbing all over them sexually. Besides a nice hug is good for everybody!
I'm very much with you're way of thinking. It's nothing more than commradery, an exchange of positive energy. I don't freak out if my genetals happen to touch another man's during a hug either. When you get to a certain age, you realize that a penis is just penis. When I played football in highschool, there were 20 guys showering at the same time, talking and laughing, even making harmless jokes about someone being small or large. It was innocent and understood to be as such. Why is it such a big deal when we get older? I you meet me, give me a big bear hug. It's alright with me.
Im fortunate in that my closest friends are a great group of guys who arent shy about hugs. Sadly, theyre not nudists. Theyre all straight and most are married. But rarely do we part ways (whether one on one or in a group) where we dont share a hug and even say I love you to each other. Its great to have friends like that.
This past year, since Ive started meeting some other nudists, its been rewarding to share a similar bond with some of them. Theres just something very affirming about sharing a hug and warm embrace from a nudist brother. Especially in the context of a platonic friendship relationship.
I agree that an innocent hug is wonderful to give or receive! I also find it odd how some people are more open to having casual oral sex than a casual hug. I grew up in a culture of handshaking or at best shoulder bumping or pyramid hugging (leaning into someone to touch both shoulders only), but I'm a full frontal hugger and proud of it.
I hung with a group of people for many years who were great huggers and it came to be my norm for greeting friends. Not so much a social kisser but lately I have been more inclined to that too, and I like it. Except for a few relatives and close friends who give solid hugs, I find that even casual nudist guys are more likely to give genuine solid hugs than some of my textile friends. They tend to give those really light hugs, bordering on air hugs.
"A 'kiss' is [just] a kiss....."
While it's true that in some countries men do kiss (usually just on the cheeks) and hug, it's not with the level of affection that people in other countries, like the U.S., perceive it as.
Sadly, some countries like the U.S. have been taken over to some extent by the judgment of cis gender, hetero-normative, "macho" shitheads who find the display of emotions between men, even if not directed towards them, to be "threatening" because it's seen as "gay". (Between women is ok with them because they find that to be "hot".) The rest of societies conform to acceptable levels of male-on-male interaction less we threaten the homophobes. We don't hug and if we do it's an A-frame hug (so the dicks don't touch), maybe a bit of back slapping to assert our "masculinity" and it's over quickly so no one sees us. We definitely don't kiss. We maintain an acceptable distance from each other at urinals with no patricians. And we undress under tightly secured towels in locker rooms less we burst into flames because someone sees our butt or penis.
For these reasons, as a gay man I much prefer gay nudist events / establishments. Everyone is free to display their friendship and male bonding openly without the FEAR from others that we might be gay . . . . . . because we ARE.
I hug/kiss many of my Male Str8 Friends, They are ok with that./ If you are a real man, you don't care what other pple think about Male to Male affection; unless you live in very dangerous homophobic country.
So go ahead, HUG/KISS enjoy M2M camaraderie ;o)