Husband's who have wives That don't like nudity
Return to DiscussionsI really do not get the numerous posts from men saying their wives "won't let them" or get mad at them for being nude around the house or pool or wherever. Are you guys 10 years old! She is not your mother. Nudity is freeing, beautiful, natural, feels good and all of the other wonderful sensations it gives a person. If another in a relationship feels different then that's their choice. Life is too brief to live without doing what you want to do. When I started to be nude around the house I would get the looks and comments but I simply said " don't look if you don't want to see" I said this is how I like to be. My advice to men who want to be nude when and where they want is to just do it. If your partner does not want you to be able to do what pleases yourself then the real problem isn't nudity but something far more revealing.
I think the problem is respect for another's feelings and wishes.
Yes, if one does not care for nudity then there may be an embedded mental issue. Whether its personal, religious or whatever. However, in our marriage we have built everything on working together and respecting what the other wants and/or needs. Not doing so shows the disintegration of a relationship.
There are a number of comments I wanted to type, but just as with my wife's feelings, I don't want to hurt yours.
Any partnership, especially one based around love involves a lot of give and take. Thankfully my wife doesn't mind me being naked, although she has privacy concerns. We have worked out an acceptable level that we are both happy with, which means that I can be naked 100% of the time, but I have to be careful in the front lounge, and I have to wear shorts in the visible areas in the middle of our back garden.
If she did mind, then we would still work out an acceptable level, but that level would be lower. That would not stop me respecting her feelings, or stop me loving her
One of most important lesson I've learnt since I began to attend nudist places is the respect of each other.
If it's true that as nudist I have the right to be nude, it's also true that textile people have the right to don't wanna see naked bodies around them.
It's always a question of respect and understand where someone's freedom ends to let begin otherone's freedom.
I think the problem is respect for another's feelings and wishes.
Totally agree, but why is it so many posts and comments make it seem like the feelings and wishes of the textile takes precedence over those of the nudist? Isn't the nudist offended by the textile wearing clothing? Shouldn't the nudist request the textile remove their clothing in order to respect their feelings and wishes?
Food for thought.
I do like your bold suggestion. In India our culture is so closed and conservative, many man struggle. I too felt the same at one point. Then It was so clear to me that I must live the way I want to be. Ofcourse when your partner in life feels awkward it becomes difficult. But it is your decision that matters.
Totally agree, but why is it so many posts and comments make it seem like the feelings and wishes of the textile takes precedence over those of the nudist? Isn't the nudist offended by the textile wearing clothing? Shouldn't the nudist request the textile remove their clothing in order to respect their feelings and wishes?Food for thought.
In a word no. Some nudists are offended by the attitudes of the textiles, but not by the clothing. If you get offended just because someone is wearing jeans, then frankly there is something wrong with you.
Having said that, context is very important. For example in a nudist resort it would be acceptable and understandable for a nudist to expect a textile to either undress or leave. If it was a C/O resort then already this argument is lost - it is then the choice of each individual.
If you have a 100% nudist home, and make everyone aware then again, you give the textiles the choice of undressing or leaving.
In the real world though, that situation is very unusual and rare. The best way to deal with this, as has been said, is to respect each other's opinion and choices and live and let live.
I really do not get the numerous posts from men saying their wives "won't let them" or get mad at them for being nude around the house or pool or wherever. Are you guys 10 years old! She is not your mother. Nudity is freeing, beautiful, natural, feels good and all of the other wonderful sensations it gives a person. If another in a relationship feels different then that's their choice. Life is too brief to live without doing what you want to do. When I started to be nude around the house I would get the looks and comments but I simply said " don't look if you don't want to see" I said this is how I like to be. My advice to men who want to be nude when and where they want is to just do it. If your partner does not want you to be able to do what pleases yourself then the real problem isn't nudity but something far more revealing.
I think I understand where the OP is coming from. I too have read the very common postings of men saying their wives won't let them or approve of nudity. Living day in and day out in a relationship as we have, I thought with an element of indignity who officially appointed one over the other to dictate what one can and cannot do? So I get what he is feeling.
I also think the OP is spot on in his final sentence. It forces me to once again remember where I was at 1st marriage go-around. I could then identify with any guy posting my wife doesn't allow it or doesn't approve. My Ex was 5' nothing 110 lbs of very large in charge and not just over something like nudity. I do remember I followed her 'wishes' in a need to keep the peace mindset.
Marriage is about compromise in all aspects of the relationship. Di and I have ALWAYS discussed issues, situations and options on just about every aspect of our lives that involve the other, nudism was no different and because it was a lifestyle choice I wanted, it was discussed. Thankfully, it wasn't at any significant length because Di was onboard with nudism being our lifestyle choice and her choice for raising our girls.
We talked openly and honestly about nudism and what it meant to both of us and how we wanted to live and how much we wanted it to be apart of our lives. Home nudism was easy and there was little discussion about it because we both loved living that way. Social nudism became more of a compromise but within a very short time, we both agreed on how to approach it and it too has also been part of our normal nudist lifestyle.
I've also read, as the OP has, with much concern about the relationships between the nudist men and their intolerant spouses with regards to nudity. It's difficult to understand how one half of a couple in a marriage can be so demanding and against something has truly does not harm the other. I understand the need not to upset the other person in the relationship but it's difficult to understand why simple nudity is objected to in many of these relationships. There doesn't seem to be any compromise or open, honest discussion going on and there truly seems to be other underlying issues that either are not being disclosed or discussed amongst the two involved.
We talked openly and honestly about nudism and what it meant to both of us and how we wanted to live
There, in a nut shell is the answer.
One thing that Mar and me find odd is this obsession with couples and arguments. We've heard it on the radio, we've heard it on the TV, and Mar even read it in the latest romance novel she read.
"There is something wrong with couples who don't argue. Either (a) one is dominating the other, who then dare not argue, or (b) neither are bothered enough"
This does seem to be a common held belief, but to us it just seems wrong. I was with my late wife for 15 years and we never argued. I've been with Mar for 8 years and we've never argued. To these people I say just one thing (okay three things)
Margaret is perfect
Our relationship is perfect.
We don't argue and never have.
Yes we talk and discuss, but never argue. We are usually both of the same opinion anyway so discussions are usually short :-)
(Apart from nudist beaches, which Mar still isn't comfortable in visiting, but we'll get there)