Todays Nude Joke

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Quote of the day

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I learn from the mistakes of others.......................who took my advice.

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There's no need to drive me crazy, l'm close enough to walk.

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Don't bother walking a mile in my shoes.. spend 30 seconds in my head, that'll freak you right out.

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I went for a nice run yesterday...I didn't plan on it, but the ice cream truck didn't stop.

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I've decided on my new career. I'm going to be a backward stripper. I come on stage naked and people pay me to put my clothes back on.

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There is a play Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike in which Spike appears on stage in underwear and puts the rest of his clothes on with the types of body motions strippers use when taking them off.

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I think some things are better left unsaid ....and l usually think that right after l say it.

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I told my wife I wanted to be cremated..... She made me an appointment for Tuesday.

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I told my wife I wanted to be cremated..... She made me an appointment for Tuesday.

If you make it to your appointment and it's successful. we won't be hearing from you anymore after the next 3 days.

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If you don't swear while driving.....you're not paying enough attention to the road.

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By the time someone says something in the meeting worth writing down, l've likely already taken my pen apart and lost the spring.

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