I woke up this morning and said to my wife, Honey, Im dead.
She responded What's the matter with you, you aren't dead. You're talking to me."
"No, I'm definitely dead".
"You are not dead. Why do you think you're dead?"
"Because nothing hurts.
An elderly couplewere attending church services. About halfway through, she writes a note and hands it to her husband. It says, " I just let out a silent fart, what do you think I should do?" He scribbles back, "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."
A college student challenged a senior citizen, saying it was impossible for their generation to understand his.
You grew up in a different world, the student said. Today we have television, jet planes, space travel,
nuclear energy, and computers.
Taking advantage of a pause in the students litany, the old dude said, Youre right sonny. We didnt have those things when we were young; so we invented them! What are you doing for the next generation??
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night . The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late." The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?" The man replies, "That would be my wife."
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night . The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late." The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?" The man replies, "That would be my wife."
I see you've met my wife then,ha,ha.
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and is asked where he is going at this time of night . The man replies, "I am on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late." The officer then asks, "Really? Who is giving that lecture at this time of night?" The man replies, "That would be my wife."
I see you've met my wife then,ha,ha.
Your's too HuH???? Must be a S.O.P. type thing!
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