RE: And The Barmaid Said:

If you buy me a gin, I may let you in.

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

A Vodka and lemonade
May get you laid

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

Violets are blue, Orchids are white,
If you touch me, I will bite.

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

Men are like.....High heels.
They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

I'm the best you're going to get tonight

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

Where did everyone go?

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

Where did everyone go?
They have all gone to the bathroom to play with Mrs Palmer, after spending so too much time looking at the busty barmaid.
(56)

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage.

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

This post 55# should be 58, but the phantom post pincher has had his wicked way yet again.


The barmaid said I was the best she'd ever had. I was feeling quite pleased with myself, until I found out she was a virgin.

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RE: And The Barmaid Said:

A lawyer married a barmaid who had previously divorced ten husbands.
On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function,
but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just
couldn't get the system up.
Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order,
he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research,
implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how,
but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was..... ah ....... God! I miss him!
But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
"Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
The barmaid said, "You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"

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