RE: Random thoughts and jokes"When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to discover they are not it."
~Bernard Bailey
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RE: Random thoughts and jokes"The price of freedom of religion, or of speech, or of the press, is that we must put up with a good deal of rubbish."
~Robert Jackson
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Post #1114ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokes"The price of freedom of religion, or of speech, or of the press, is Terrorism"
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesThose who do not learn from the past are destine to relive it!
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesTwo policemen call the station on their radio.
"Hello. ..... Is this the Sarge?"
"Yes?"
"We have a case here, Sarge.
A woman has shot her husband dead for stepping on the floor she had mopped."
"Have you arrested the woman?"
"No sir. The floor is still wet."
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesQ: "Anyone remember that fairytale about the uncircumcised troll?
A: I think it was called Rumpled Foreskin"
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesIf the metric system did ever take over, we'd have to change our thinking to the following:
A miss is as good as 1.1 kilometers.
Put your best 0.3 of a meter forward.
Spare the 5.03 meters and spoil the child.
Give a man 2.5 centimeters and he'll take 1.06 kilometers.
Peter Piper picked 8.8 liters of pickled peppers.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI was in the Buccaneer Lounge last night sitting at the bar waiting for a fresh scotch and water, when a
butt-ugly, big old heifer came up behind me, and slapped me on the ass.
She said, "Hey, sexy, how about giving me your number?"
I looked at her said, "Have you got a pen."
She said, "I sure do."
I said, "Well, you better get back into it before the farmer notices you're missing."
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI'm reading a great
book on anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesMany times as I'm browsing through a bookstore I will find a book that I have read.
I will glance through it. I will see old friends.
I will leave them there. I do not need them as roommates.
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