RE: Random thoughts and jokes

When hugging someone you care for always bring them to your left so your hearts meet.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

A man was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he
thought he was driving just fine.Officer: "You were speeding." Man:
"No, I wasn't." Officer: "Yes, you were.
I'm giving you a ticket." Man: "But I
wasn't speeding." Officer: "Tell that to the
judge!" (The officer gives man the ticket.) Man: "Would I get
another ticket if I called you a jerk?" Officer: "Yes, you would."
Man: "What if I just thought that you were?" Officer: "I
can't give you a ticket for what you think."
Man: "Fine, I think you're a jerk!"

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

Is it OK
if I bite the hand that doesn't feed me?

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

What would happen if you hired two private investigators to follow each other ?

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

Rainy Day Reminiscing
The bar was closing. I asked the beautiful cocktail waitress, "Your place or mine?"
She replied, "Both." "You go to yours and I will go to
mine."

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

It just so happens that Princess Di and Dolly Parton make it to
the gates of Heaven on the same day.

Saint Peter meets them at the gates and tells them that there is
only one opening to be had so they needed to give their best reason
why they should be admitted to Heaven.

Dolly opens her shirt to reveal her magnificent breasts and
tells Saint Peter to take a good look.

"Have you ever seen such a marvelous sight as these that God
gave me?

Surely these alone should be reason enough to admit
me through these gates".

Princess Di just pulls out a bottle of seltzer water, shakes it,
shoves it up her privates and lets fly with the foaming
water.

Saint Peter opens the gates and directs Princess Di to
enter.

Dolly is incensed and says to Saint Peter How could you let her
enter???

I show you these marvelous breasts
and she does an obscene act yet you let her enter before
me?.

"Sorry Dolly," says Saint Peter "but you know that a Royal Flush
beats a pair anyday".

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

Answer: Cumquat ...
Question: How do you call your quat?

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

And speaking of legal terms - re the thread game ... Have you ever
heard of a case where a person was accused of assault with pepper
spray?

-----
It would appear that Karaoke has something in common with naked
running... in both cases, you can follow the bouncing ball ... on the
screen or on the street. ;-)

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RE: Random thoughts and jokes

And speaking of legal terms - re the threadgame ... Have you ever heard of a case where a person was accusedof assault with pepperspray?-----It would appear that Karaoke has something in common with nakedrunning... in both cases, you can follow the bouncing ball ... onthe screen or on the street. ;-)


YES!
https://nixle.com/alert/5178825/



Even tho I know you were making a salt/pepper joke.


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