Post #502ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokesMoney can't buy happiness, but it can help you look for it quicker, in a convertible.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI wouldn't say my ex was 'EASY' - She was just 'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI don't iron because I choose to believe them when they say "Permanent Press".
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesAt one time I worked as an AD executive. I had a young beautiful female personal assistant. She would get upset when I called her sweetie or hon, especially in public. She complained, but I just ignored her whining. One evening we had a business meeting in an upscale restaurant. As we entered I asked, "Where would you like to sit, sweetheart?" and winked at the maitre d'.
"Gee," she replied, "anywhere you say, Dad."
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesThe medic examined the corporal and announced,
"This soldier has taken corkscrews to the head, nail files to the chest,
dozens of shallow cuts, and tiny scissors to the kneecaps.
He's obviously had some sort of run-in with the Swiss Army!"
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Post #507ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokesGot thrown out a strip club last night for using monopoly money. I dont see why I should pay real money to see fake boobs.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI don't put things away because Ill never be able to find them again.
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Post #509ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokesIf the shelves are dusty and the pots don't shine,
it's because I have better things to do with my time.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesBees that have honey in the mouth have stings in their tails
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesWhile money can't buy happiness, it certainly lets you choose your own form of misery.
~Groucho Marx
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