RE: Random thoughts and jokesWhen life knocks me down, instead of getting back up I usually lie there and take a nap.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI hated it when my dog sat there and smiled as I picked up his crap.
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Post #724ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokesAn Israeli doctor says: "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in 6 weeks." A British doctor says: "That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in 4 weeks." A Canadian doctor says: "In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in 2 weeks." An American doctor, not to be outdone, says: "You guys are way behind...... We just took a man with NO brain, made him President, and now the whole country is looking for work.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI was sitting on the porch sipping wine with my ex when she said, "I love you."
I sarcastically asked, "Is that you or the wine talking?"
She quietly replied, "Its me, talking to the wine."
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Post #726ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokesI know nothing about sex, because I was always married.
~Zsa Zsa Gabor
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesTravel is very educational. I can now say "Kaopectate" in seven different languages.
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Post #728ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokesEating in foreign restaurants is very educational. I can now sayvomit in 15 different languages.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesI gave up multitasking, with me means screwing up several things at once...
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Post #730ManOfWicklowUltra NudistA lie has speed, but truth has endurance. RE: Random thoughts and jokesPeople in cars cause accidents. Accidents in cars cause people.
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RE: Random thoughts and jokesToday I went to four different hardware stores. Why is it so hard to find hummingbird poison?
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