Two women are at the water cooler, and the first one says,
"I've got a sore throat."
The second one says, "You know, whenever I have a sore throat,
I go home and give my husband a blow job, and it clears it right up. You should try it."
The next day they're at the water cooler again.
The second girl says, "It worked like a charm. I feel much better. You know,
your husband just couldn't believe it was your idea."
The devil assigned him the usual punishment...put him in the mass pit where the heat was melting others. The devil came back sometime later surprised to find the Cajun just sitting around, not even misting, much less sweating. "How come you're not so much as sweating here where everyone else is screaming for relief from the heat?" The Cajun laughed and said, "Man, I was raised in the bayous of Sout Looziana. Dis ain't nothin' but May in Lafayette to me!" The devil decided to really put the Cajun through it. He put him in a sealed off cave in the pit with open blazes and four extra furnaces blasting. When he came back, days later, the Cajun was sitting pretty, had barely begun to bead up with sweat. The devil was outraged. "How is this possible!? You should be melted to a shrieking puddle in these conditions!." The Cajun kept grinning and asked, "Dis mean de Saints won da Super Bowl?" The Cajun laughed even harder than before. "Hey, man! I done tole you. I was raised in Sout Looziana.. You tink dis is heat?! Dis ain't nothin' but August in Jennings !" So the devil thought, 'Alright, a little reverse ought to do the trick.' He put the Cajun into a corner of hell where no heat ever reached. It was freezing and to add to the Cajun's misery, he added massive icebergs and blasting frozen air. When he returned, the Cajun was shivering, ice hung from every part of him but he was grinning like it was Christmas. Exasperated, the devil asked "HOW!? How is it possible?! You're impervious to heat and here you sit in conditions you can't be used to...freezing cold and yet you're happier than if you were in heaven. WHY?!" The Cajun kept grinning and asked, "Dis mean de Saints won da Super Bowl?" When hell freezes over and I loved every minute of it. Go Saints.
A small boy is sent to bed by his mother...
Five minutes later,
"Mom..."
"What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a glass of water?"
"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later,
"Mom..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY...Can I have a glass of water??"
"I told you NO! If you ask again I'll have to spank you!!"
Five minutes later,
"Mommm..."
"WHAT??!!"
"When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a glass of water?
Con Man Charged With Selling Eternal Youth Tablets
The police recently busted a man selling tablets he said gave eternal youth.
When going through their files they noticed it was the fourth time he was
caught for doing this.
He had earlier been arrested in 1794, 1856 and 1928.
A woman was sipping a glass of wine, while sitting on the patio with her husband, and she says,
"I love you so much, I don't know how I could ever live without you."
Her husband asks, "Is that you, or the wine talking?"
She replies, "It's me ............... talking to the wine."..
This should be understood by the Brits at least.Why did the chicken cross the road?Because it was stuffed under Antony Worrall-Thomson's coat.
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2084067/Antony-Worrall-Thompson-sorry-shoplifting-cheese-wine-Tesco.html
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