You might be a... textile/nudist

I thought it might be fun twist to reinvent the old Jeff Foxworthy routine "...you might be a redneck".

So here goes.

If you think the sight of naturally feeding a child would be harmful to a child.... you might be a textile.

or,

If you wish your towel had pockets.... you might be a nudist.

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If the only clothes at your house are for the scarecrow--------you may be a nudist

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If you do more than two loads of laundry a week that are nothing but towels . . . . . you MIGHT be a nudist.

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If a blizzard means a chance to make naked snow angels-----you might be a nudist

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If you put a winter coat on your dog to go play in the snow while you make nude snow angels===you may be a nudist

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If sunscreen is a major budget item in spring, summer, and fall you might be a nudist.

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If you look into the windows of clothing stores and recoil in horror, you might be a nudist. If your newest items of apparel are bell-bottom pants and a Nehru jacket, you might be a nudist. If the nude scenes in movies make you yawn, you might be a nudist. If your ensemble for the day is sandals and a towel, you might be a nudist. If you have a reserved parking space at the local resort, you might be a nudist. If your kids ask, "Who are you?" when they see you clothed, you might be a nudist. If you ever had a sunburned willy, you might be a nudist. If you have a robe hanging by the front door, you might be a nudist. If the JWs have your home on a blacklist, you might be a nudist. If you nod in recognition at any of these, you might be a nudist.

I had to laugh at a few of them. :)

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If while looking in a clothing stores window, if you comment that you might look good wearing what the maniquin is wearing, and its got nothing on, you might be a nudist

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

If you don't own a bathing suit.......you might be a nudist!

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

You might be a nudist if...
- your spouse says "I have nothing to wear" and it's true.
- someone says "make yourself comfortable" and you get undressed.
- people always comment on how warm your house is in the winter.
- you painted your house and didn't get of your clothes dirty.
- you have a pool but don't own any swimsuits.
- you don't have to clean lint from your hot tub filter.

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RE: You might be a... textile/nudist

You noticed her smile, her hair style, her shoes, her eye color, you chatted with her for 1/2 hour, and still have no idea whatever if she was wearing anything else.
( or him, as the case may be. )

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